


Except for Souji

by zerowin



Category: Persona 2, Persona 3, Persona 4, Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-04
Updated: 2018-11-03
Packaged: 2019-03-27 04:39:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 35
Words: 24,824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13873326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zerowin/pseuds/zerowin
Summary: The protagonists form a group chat, and summon their boyfriends.The ingredients? Nudes.





	1. Chapter 1

_Nyoom added Tatsuya, Minty, Chad, and Akira_

Nyoom: I have something very important to declare.

Akira: Did you suck Uesugi's dick.

Nyoom: Not yet.

Chad: Can I guess?

Nyoom: Who are you again?

Chad: That is rude.

Nyoom: Anyways, shhhh and let me declare what I wanted to declare.

Nyoom: I want Uesugi to step on me.

Akira: Tatsuyaaa...

_Tatsuya kicked Nyoom_

Minty: I don't know about you guys, but I'm sending that to Hidehiko-kun.

Akira: You have his number?

Minty: I saw it on Earring Kink boys phone once.

Chad: Earring kink boy?

Minty: Who are you, again?

Chad: I trusted you, Mina-chan.

Akira: Mina-chan.

Minty: Ew, Chad, go back to Brosuke.

Minty: Yeah, Akira?

Akira: :^)

Chad: I love you guys but stop bullying me.

_Nyoom added himself_

Nyoom: Fuckboy.

Chad: :(

Chad: Tatsuya.....

_Tatsuya added Yosucce and Jun_

Chad: Woah, looking cool Joker!

Jun: How do I kick him?

Akira: Strangle him, Kurosu.

Jun: I'm tempted.

Yosucce: S T O P DONT 

Akira: Hello, Yosuke!

Yosucce: Oh hey Akira

Nyoom: All I wanted was for Uesugi to step on me.. And I get this mess..

Akira: It's okay, I'm sure he'll step on you one day.

Tatsuya: Jun.

Jun: Tatsuya.

Yosucce: if you guys wanna fuck we wont judge

Chad: YOSUKE.

Akira: YOSUKE.

Minty: YOSUKE.

Yosucce: AM I WRONG THO?

Nyoom: PUT YOUR BOYFRIEND INTO LINE, CHAD SETA.

Chad: YOU DONT JUST SAY THAT

Jun: He's not wrong.

Tatsuya: ..I wanted to ask him out on a date but okay.

Jun: I'm more than willing to go out on a date with you.

Akira: Come to Leblanc, I'll make sure no one says anything.

Jun: That's very sweet, Akira. Thank you.

Tatsuya: I got a dog, too.

Akira: PICS OR IT DIDN'T HAPPEN.

Tatsuya: You just want pictures.

Akira: I WONT DENY THAT, SEND THEM.

_Tatsuya sent 37 pictures_

_Tatsuya sent 3 videos_

Akira: Did you call her "Katsu-pain"..?

Tatsuya: Katsuya's pain is funny to me.

Jun: She's not your dog anymore.

Tatsuya: Excuse me?

Tatsuya: Jun????

Tatsuya: What are you talking about???

Tatsuya: Jun????????

Nyoom: Protect her at all costs.

Tatsuya: Where is she??????????

Jun: With me.

Tatsuya: Why?????????????

Jun: Because.

Tatsuya: Can I have her back?

Jun: Kiss me and maybe.

Akira: Ewww mom and dad are flirting again, Naoyaaaa... Save meee..

Nyoom: SASUGA JOKER

Jun: I'll fight you.

_Akira added Yusuke, Shihoe, and Annihalation_

Chad: I want Akira to beat me up and kill me.

Akira: NDLEBFLRKB SOUJI

Nyoom: HE'S LIKE 2 YEARS OLD SOUJI

Akira: I'm 11 so shut the fuck up.

Shihoe: Nani the fuck

Annihalation: SHIHO 

Nyoom: NOT IN MY CHRISTIAN SERVER

Yusuke: What is this?

Akira: It's the Protagonist group chat.

Nyoom: It's for CHRISTIANS.

Yosucce: id do Souji in a church

Yusuke: I'm sorry, but if it's for the protagonists, then why are we here?

Akira: Because, I love you.

Annihalation: akira thats so gay

Akira: I know.

Yosucce: WHOS THIS?

Yusuke: Your mom.

Chad: I THOUGHT YOU TOLD US HE WAS A SAINT, AKIRA

Minty: I like him already can we keep him?

Annihalation: is akira into paint play

Akira: ANN

_Chad renamed Tatsuya to Deja Vu_

_Chad renamed Nyoom to Earring Kink_

_Chad renamed Yusuke to Paint Kink_

Earring Kink: I'd suck off an earring I'm not gonna lie

Paint Kink: I'd rather not suck off paint, that is very dangerous.

Akira: I'd suck off paint.

_Minty invited Death_

Death: Hello!!

Death: Dont suck off paint, please.

Paint Kink: His name is rather frightening.. But his personality is welcoming.

Minty: Yeah I want him to

Death: Love you? I already do.

_Chad sent a photo_

Death: Cute, I dont have nearly enough pictures of him smiling like that! That's unfair.

Chad: Come over here and marry him.

Minty: Please

Death: Do? Alright, if that's what you want! :>

Minty: Ryoji..

Death: Marry me? Aren't we already engaged?

Earring Kink: Go get 'em, Bird boy.

Annihalator: What am I doing here, anyways?

Akira: The writer really likes ShihoAnn so you're here for their satisfaction.

Shihoe: What?

Akira: What?

Morgana: You must be tired after today

Akira: AAAAAAAAAAAA

Earring Kink: I just.. Really want Uesugi to step on me.


	2. Sucking dick isn't a form of Persona-training, and you should know this.

Annihalator: Akira what was that about?

Akira: I cant explain.

Paint Kink: I'd like to know, too.

Earring Kink: What did he do?

Shihoe: Pls tell me he bullied Ann.

Annihalator: SHIHO THATS MEAN

Shihoe: It's tough love, ily <3 lots.

Annihalator: Aw

Annihalator: Anyways I WANT ANSWERS.

Akira: I dont know what you're talking about.

Chad: Tell me.

Annihalator: He was doing that thing when he spaces out for long periods of time in the EXACT SAME PLACE IN EVERY PALACE, but he looked like he was in a conversation??

Annihalator: I was like ??? Okay hes weird so he does that.

Annihalator: BUT THEN HE SAYS "Does dick sucking count as a form of Persona training?" and then I SWEAR I could see a hand SLAM HIM INTO THE GROUND.

Akira: Ann! 

Akira: Caroline didn't answer my question, just btw.

Shihoe: Who's that? Your imaginary friend?

 

_Deja Vu removed his nickname_

 

Tatsuya: Velvet Room attendant?

Akira: Yeah, to Tatsuya. If I had an imaginary friend I wouldn't name it Caroline, that's dumb.

Akira: PAJDJEJJFKR

Paint Kink: This is the most I've seen him talk since I asked him about why he makes fun of Akechi so much, how stimulating.

Yosucce: Dude..

Chad: Kinky.

Earring Kink: Anyone else wondering what happened to Akira?

Akira: hed dn eaaxmmd

Shihoe: He's dead.

Paint Kink: Can I have my boyfriend back, Morgana?

Akira: asj ryppjki

Shihoe: Ask Ryoji.

Death: You'll have to pay me back.

Paint Kink: Minato-san, may I ask for your help?

Minty: I'll do you.

Death: Deal.

Paint Kink: Thank you for your help.

Minty: You're welcome, painter boy.

Chad: I cant believe Minato just made a deal with death.

Chad: He's really THAT much of an emo.

Minty: Hey, Souji? I can always make a deal with him to kill you, you know.

Chad: Please do.

 

_Akira changed the group chats name to "Please kill everyone in this chat oh mighty one"_

 

Akira: Not Yusuke, Yosuke, or Shiho though.

Annihalator: Why am I getting murdered?

Akira: Because you laughed at me when Caroline ABUSED ME.

Annihalator: IT WAS FUNNY.

Paint Kink: It was rather amusing.

Akira: Please keep smiling, Yusuke. I love you.

Paint Kink: :)

Akira: 

Akira: 

Akira:

Tatsuya: I cant believe Akira is fucking dead.

Chad: I expected that from MINATO not YOU.

Chad: Also, I have something really important to tell you guys.

Jun: If this is a situation like Naoya's stepping fetish, I'm banning you from the chat.

Earring Kink: That's mean.

Minty: Okay, shoot.

Chad: I love Yosuke.

Yosucce: PARTNER 

Yosucce: That's rly nice thank you ilyt.

 

_Earring Kink changed his name to "StepOnMeUesugi"_

 

Jun: Stop.

Akira: Naoya we're like twelve.

Minty: I'm eleven so shut the fuck up.

Chad: Calm your dick, Naoya.

StepOnMeUesugi: Like you're one to talk.

Chad: 

Chad: 

Chad:

Chad:

Chad: My dick only rises for Yosuke.

Yosucce: You see me every day???

Chad: Yeah

Tatsuya: We have a  _child_  in here.

Akira: :(

 

_Paint Kink removed his nickname_

 

 

Yusuke: Seta, be quiet.

Chad: Fair.

 

Minty: Can I talk about how sad I get every time I pass Shujin and I hear something mean about Akira?

Jun: I wasn't aware that you could feel emotions.

Death: Oh, I did.

Minty: Yeah, but you lived inside me for most of your life, so that doesn't count.

Shihoe: I'm so confused??? That sounds kinky????? Is Minty into vore???????

Annihalator: ^^^

Minty: I'll explain later.

Shihoe: I don't know if I want you to.

Tatsuya: Talk about how sad you get when you pass Shujin.

Minty: It's just.. I hear them saying things like, "I heard he'll stab you the moment you look him in the eye", but Akira's actually more like..

Minty: ;3c >:3c :3

Minty: And they'll never know because they try to distance themselves from him when he did nothing wrong.

Annihalator: He convinced me shoes weren't real.

Akira: Minato..

Chad: You know, if we walk into his class and bully him maybe everyone will think he's weak and the person who spread the rumour is full of shit.

Yusuke: I will break your arms.

Chad: I'm sorry, I'll take this seriously.

Annihalator: Let's dress him in a maid costume.

Yusuke: I believe he'd look stunning in a maid outfit, his curves and short stature would most certainly be put on display in the most wonderful way.

Chad: I thought we were taking this seriously.

Akira: I'm not that short.

Tatsuya: I'm pretty sure the only ones shorter than you in this group chat are Minato, Ann, and Shiho. 

Annihalator: I'm almost at his level. 7 more cm and I'm his size.

Minato: He has 5 cm on me.

Akira: I'll fight both of you.

Shihoe: I'm sure you'll grow, Akira!

Yosucce: What she said^

Akira: You're the only ones I can trust.

Chad: Yosuke is the exact same size as you, he's only on your side because indirectly we're ganging up on him, too.

Yosucce: Partner why do you betray me like this.

Chad: Because I love you.

Shihoe: This chat is so much fun but I'm always so confused at some of the things you guys talk about.

Shihoe: What's a Persona?

Akira: Oh, right, Shiho's the only one who doesn't have a Persona here.

Chad: Wanna go into the tv world?

Yosucce: ParTNER WE DONT JUST ASK PEOPLE THAT

Shihoe: Sounds like fun, lets do it.

Yusuke: I lack knowledge of this "Tv World".

StepOnMeUesugi: LETS ALL GO

Tatsuya: No, that's reckless, especially if you plan on taking people who have no idea what they're going to be facing.

Chad: ITS A DATE.

Tatsuya: Why do I even try..

Jun: It's okay, how about we go with them, to keep an eye on them?

Tatsuya: I sense an ulterior motive, but if you want to, I'll go.

StepOnMeUesugi: TV WORLD TV WORLD TV WORLD

Yusuke: TV world, TV world, TV world!

Annihalator: TV WORLD TV WORLD TV WORLD

Shihoe: IM HAVING SO MUCH FUN HOW DO WE GO INTO THE TV WORLD

Chad: You step,,, into a tv.

Yosucce: It's really weird the first time, but you'll get used to it, dont worry, Suzui-san.

Shihoe: That sounds SICK when are we going.

Minty: Next chapter, the writer is getting tired. They should go to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

StepOnMeUesugi: Hey Aki-chan.

Akira: What?

StepOnMeUesugi: You looked pretty cute in the TV there.

Akira: Can we not talk about that?

Yusuke: I'd like to paint you in your full glory, sometime.

Akira: Are you seriously making fun of me? My own boyfriend?

Shihoe: "This is me! In my full glory! I'm you, Akira Kurusu."

Akira: SHIHO.

Akira: Why did you make me SEE that, it was supposed to be SHIHO's shadow we were facing.

Shihoe: My Shadow was fuckin sick tho I'd fuck her.

Annihalator: Same.

StepOnMeUesugi: Akira in his Phantom Thief attire? MMmMMmMM

Yusuke: I agree.

Akira: Can you stop?

StepOnMeUesugi: No, I never knew the clothes were so cute wth. I want you to STAB me with your knife shoes.

Shihoe: I never would have thought the leader of the Phantom thiefs fought people with high heels.

Yusuke: He has thigh highs too.

Annihalator: HOW DO YOU KNOW?

Yusuke: He's my boyfriend.

Akira: Please change the subject, please.

Tatsuya: Shiho's shadow was cool.

Shihoe: BZOOM BZOOM

Jun: It had a noose, though. Why?

Shihoe: WELL you see.

Shihoe: I tried to end myself, once.

Jun: Oh, I'm very sorry, Suzui-san. I hope things are better for you.

Shihoe: They are! I have a totally adorable girlfriend, and really cool friends! I can use the rope for bondage reasons.

Jun: That's really sweet, Suzui-san. And.. What?

Shihoe: ;)

Jun: ..Can I borrow it sometime?

Tatsuya: Jun.

Jun: Tatsuya, darling~

Chad: I didn't expect Suzui to be so chill about her shadow, though. 

Annihalator: I know! She's so strong!

Annihalator: Question, though. Does Akira only wear those glasses so he can see inside the TV?

Akira: Yeah, I keep forgetting to take them off.

Annihalator: Can you see without them?

Akira: Basically.

Annihalator: WHAT take them off in school tomorrow you'll get some dick.

Yusuke: No.

Akira: Does this method work around Yu-chan?

Yusuke: Yes.

Akira: Tempting.

Chad: "I'm always so alone.. I'm jealous of Ann-" "GOD YOUR SO COOL ARE YOU ME?" "Yea-" "THATS SICK"

Shihoe: IT WAS, talking to her is so much fun.

Annihalator: ??? Talking to her???

Shihoe: Yeah! I talk to my Persona all the time, she's fun.

Akira: I talk to Arsene, sometimes.

Chad: Izanagi is fun.

Tatsuya: Zipper-dick?

Chad: TATSUYA

Jun: TATSUYA.

Tatsuya: But he does have a zipper on his dick, does that represent how big of a chad Souji is?

Akira: HAH

Minty: Tatsuya, do you want to join my Souji Seta Bullying Association?

Tatsuya: Yeah.

Chad: TATSUYA I THOUGHT I COULD TRUST YOU

Tatsuya: It's not smart to assume.

Minty: HA.

Minty: Can I ask Shiho something?

Shihoe: Shoot.

Minty: I don't have my Evoker. But anyways, why does your Persona kinda look like Takamaki?

Shihoe: Because, I love her.

Annihalator: You say Shiho.. But then you call me Takamaki..?

Minty: She doesn't treat me like a child.

Annihalator: YOU'RE SO SHORT THOUGH.

Minty: I'M

Death: You're not? I had to make myself taller just so I could dominate you.

Minty: Wha

Death: You heard me.

Death: Also, what's up with

Minty: With Teddie? I was thinking the exact same thing.

Chad: He's.. Special.

Shihoe: I love him, can I keep him?

Yosucce: please.

Chad: You love him, too, Yosuke, don't be such a tsundere about it.

Yosucce: you're the Tsun, Partner.

Chad: Shhh

Shihoe: Aw, sweet.

Minty: Where were Jun and Tatsuya the entire time, though?

Tatsuya: Making motorcycle noises at shadows.

Jun: ^^

Yusuke: Ah, so that was you?

Tatsuya: Yeah.

Annihalator: You like motorcycles?

Tatsuya: I do.

Annihalator: YOU SHOULD MEET MAKOTO

Tatsuya: Whom?

Akira: Her Persona is a motorcycle.

Tatsuya: Why isn't mine a motorcycle..?

StepOnMeUesugi: You're gay, that's why.

Tatsuya: That's fair.

Jun: <3

Tatsuya: <3

Annihalator: I want Shiho's persona to kill me.

Shihoe: Well it has a noose.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This got off-topic really fast, because I fell ill, but it's.. Satisfactory.


	4. Jun's Ballad

Death: Okay, Akira or Jun?

Tatsuya: 

Chad: 

StepOnMeUesugi:

Minty: Ryoji, what?

Death: What am I talking about? I'm talking about whose cuter???

Tatsuya: Oh thank god I thought this was your hit list.

Death: Do you guys

Minty: Seriously expect that from you? Yes, we do.

Akira: The obvious win here is Jun, really. 

Jun: I'd say it's you, Akira.

Tatsuya: ..Hm...

Tatsuya: I'd say both, but Jun's my boyfriend so..

Yusuke: I can appreciate both.

Chad: Why is this so difficult? It's such a simple question and yet..

Death: If I put Minato into the running?

Akira: Minato.

Jun: Minato.

Chad: Minato.

StepOnMeUesugi: Yeah, Minato.

Minato: Jun and Akira.

Yusuke: Every one of them have their own set of aesthetics that could make them pleasing to the eye. 

Morgana: Akira go the fuck to sleep

Akira: Morgana, lose some weight and maybe I would be able to get some sleep.

Yusuke: Akira, is my choice.

Death: Who's Morgana?

Morgana: Your mom.

Death: Wh

Minty: He's Akira's cat.

Morgana: I'm not a cat!!!

Minty: Are you sure?

Minty: Are you sure you TINY kitten?

Morgana: hisssss

Tatsuya: Hm.. How come it's typing?

Akira: He does that sometimes.

Annihalator: He talks, we can hear him.

Shihoe: So that's why all of you look at him when he starts meowing..

Akira: Nya

Morgana: Delete that

Morgana: Delete that right now

Akira: :3c Nya

Morgana: DONT SPITE ME JOKER

Tatsuya: Joker..?

_Akira changed Morgana's name to "Monya"_

Monya: Fuk u

Jun: Please explain.

Akira: Oh, right. The Joker thing is a sore spot for you, isn't it?

Annihalator: ??? It's your code name, isnt it?????

Akira: Ann shut the fuck up

Annihalator: Whhh?

Jun: Why would you choose??? Joker?????

Jun: Of all things???

Jun: Do you know??? How dangerous that name is???

Akira: I didn't, I just went along with it. Don't worry, Jun, I'm fine.

Jun: Are you????

Monya: What's going on?

Tatsuya: Fucking Harlequin lookin' ass..

Jun: Tatsuya that's rude.

Tatsuya: Am I wrong?

Jun: No, actually. 

Monya: Exblain

Akira: Morganya, I don't think they want to.

Jun: :( Why that, of all things?

Akira: I'm sorry.

Jun: No, it's okay, it's not your fault.

Akira: Jun..

Shihoe: Wasn't there something you could call called "Joker" to answer your wishes?

Chad: You see, Kurosu-san was that  _thing_

Tatsuya: Well, yeah..

Jun: Hm..

Shihoe: Oh so you..

Shihoe:  _Oh_

Shihoe: I want to change the subject! I don't want Jun-chan to be sad!

Chad: ^^^^^

Jun: "Jun-chan"?

Shihoe: :DDDD

Jun: :/ :)

Annihalator: My HEART, god FUCK.

Tatsuya: Oof.

Chad: TATSUYA NO OOFS IN THIS CHRISTIAN CHAT

Yosucce: Christian Chat

Yosucce: We praise the dick.

Chad: You're online?

Yosucce: Ye

Yosucce: Also

Yosucce: Kurosu and Kurusu :eyes: kinda sus

Akira: Yosuke-senpai, please shut up.

Monya: Why did he type out :eyes:

Yosucce: Because sus

Monya: Normie

Akira: Stfu Monya you didnt know what S&M was until I told you.

Monya: Listen shut up

Jun: Kurosu Kurusu is just a coincidence.

StepOnMeUesugi: Black-haired, Kurosu Kurusu, Joker, Flower Experts, Very Pretty and Cute.

Shihoe: Suou-Kurosu.. Kurusu.

Shihoe: ARE YOU TWO HIS DADS

Tatsuya: No but if I see his parents raise a hand at him one more time they can BOTH catch these hands.

Akira: "Catch these hands" is the ONE thing I would have never expected from you.

Jun: I'd very willingly take them to court.

Tatsuya: And make them CATCH THESE HANDS.

Annihalator: Me too, tho. I never hear you talking about them, I didnt kno you had parents in the first place.

Death: They are on my hit list.

Minty: Same.

Shihoe: This chat changes subjects like Tumblrites change genders.

Annihalator: TUMBLRITES

Yosucce: True though.

Minty: Hey let's talk about Mara.

Chad: Hey let's not.

Annihalator: He's the CHARIOT DICK right?

Akira: Ryuji's dick.

Yusuke: Excuse me?

Akira: It's difficult to explain.

Minty: Oh, so your friend Ryuji is the Chariot? I thought he'd be the Magician.

Akira: Morgana is the Magician.

Monya: ???

Minty: What's your boyfriend?

Akira: Emperor, Ann is Lovers.

Minty: I kind of expected Ann to be a Lovers girl, she looks so PAINFULLY Lovers that I cant look at her.

Annihalator: ????

Chad: The Lovers girls are usually kind of annoying, though. And Ann is just.. Not.

Akira: Because she's the best Lovers girl and Yukari and Rise can shhhhh

Death: Yukari can BACK OFF

Minty: Ryoji, we talked about this.

Death: :(

Annihalator: I'm really confused.

Tatsuya: Lisa is nice.

Akira: Yeah I like Lisa, she's chill.

Minty: But why are the other dude-bro's Magicians and then Ryuji just.. Isn't?

Akira: ..Is Morganya the real bro?

Monya: You five are confusing everyone stfu

Akira: The Arcana is Protagonist Rights.

Monya: STOP

Shihoe: It makes sense for Ann to be in Lovers, she's perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jun is my favourite, as you can see, and I don't want him to be sad, ever. 
> 
> I'm still very unwell, and this is all I could get myself to write. But I hope it's fine!


	5. I just really love Jun and Shiho.

Tatsuya: Hey.

Chad: Tatsuya starting a conversation??? In THIS universe??? Must be important.

Tatsuya: It is.

_Tatsuya sent a photo_

Tatsuya: I love him.

Shihoe: !!!!! Jun-chan is really pretty!!!

Jun: Tatsuya..

Annihalator: Is Akira jumping into a. Lak e.

Jun: AKIRA

_Tatsuya sent a photo_

Tatsuya: It is.

Minty: RIP Akira

Minty: Also, by the way.. That's sweet, Tatsuya.

Tatsuya: I really love him.

Tatsuya: And Akira, he's like a son to me.

Shihoe: !!!! 

Annihalator: Apparently he's like a son to Jun, too.. He looks really worried in that picture.

_Tatsuya sent a photo_

Tatsuya: He's gonna get sick.

Shihoe: Does Aki even smile, I've only ever seen him :3c, never :).

_Annihalator sent a photo_

Annihalator: He does.

Yusuke: Thank you, Ann.

Annihalator: Yw Yusuke.

_Yosucce sent a photo_

Minty: Cute.

Chad: 

Minty:

Minty: I can appreciate my enemies looks, Souji.

Death: Call him Sou-chan like in our conversations, you pussy.

Minty: Shut up.

Chad: :)

Shihoe: !!!! 

Shihoe: All of you are so pretty!!! 

Jun: Of course, you are as well. 

Shihoe: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you!! And welcome back!

Death: We should take a group photo!

Shihoe: I don't think I could handle that many pretty people..

Shihoe: Let's do it!

Death: Yay!

Minty: Is Akira okay?

Jun: He's freezing and will probably get sick.

Akira: I'm fine.

Jun: Your shivering body says otherwise.

Akira: :(

Chad: Wth take him home.

Yusuke: I'd like to check on him.

Shihoe: Oh yeah!

_Shihoe added Tae Takemi_

Shihoe: !!!! 

Tae Takemi: What am I here for?

Shihoe: Akira threw himself into a lake.

Tae Takemi: Why did he do that?

Akira: I saw a lake and I gave in to temptation.

Jun: Who is this?

Akira: The doctor from whom I buy the medicine.

Annihalator: Oh!

Annihalator: Wait, how come Shiho has her number?

Tae Takemi: Akira introduced Suzui-san to me.

Shihoe: Mhm!! She's really pretty.

Tae Takemi: That's.. Thank you.

Shihoe: No problem!! :D

Jun: Do you mind if I ask why you were introduced?

Shihoe: Oh, I don't mind! Sometimes my wounds re-open.

Jun: Ah, I see.

Tae Takemi: It's no trouble, really.

Jun: How much longer do you think Akira has until he gets himself killed?

Tae Takemi: A year, maybe less.

Tae Takemi: If he's been throwing himself into lakes, I say less.

Akira: >:v Be quiet, you guys are mean.

Minty: Aren't you first place in most of your exams?

Akira: Yeah?

Minty: So how come your actions are fucking dumb?

Akira: I trusted you.

Minty: You place your trust in the wrong people.

Chad: Like gun daddy?

Minty: No, he's good.

Minty: I'd like to handle his guns sometime.

Death: I feel like I should be mad..

Minty: But you'd let him dominate you? Yeah, me too.

Death: Mhm <3

Shihoe: I have a question!

Chad: Yeah?

Shihoe: How come Ryoji and Minato always finish each others sentences?

Minty: Ah, well..

Death: I lived inside him for a while.

Minty: Ryoji that sounds

Death: Kinky? I know. I just thought

Minty: It would be funny?

Death: Yeah.

Minty: I love you.

Shihoe: !!!!!!!!! 

Shihoe: I'm so happy for you two!

Minty: Shiho-san.. 

Annihalator: She's so sweet and perfect..

Yusuke: What a wonderful display of pure love.

Tae Takemi: May I leave?

Akira: No, you're one of us now.

Jun: I have long since accepted that this is a permanent contract, I'm sure you'll get used to it in no time, Takemi-san.

Tae Takemi: I see.. Well, then.

_Tae Takemi changed her name to Takememe_

Takememe: I should go all-out, then.

Akira: :0!!!

Shihoe: ONE OF US 

Yosucce: ONE OF US ONE OF US

Yusuke: ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US

Tatsuya: One of us.

StepOnMeUesugi: Add Gun Daddy.

Akira: You don't have to tell me twice.

_Akira added Iwhy_

Iwhy: Gun Daddy?

Minty: Gun Daddy.

Akira: I should introduce Tae and Iwai to you guys, then.

Iwhy: You say that like I'm thinking of staying.

Akira: You're one of us now.

StepOnMeUesugi: ONE OF US ONE OF US

Yusuke: ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US

Chad: ONE OF US

Tatsuya: One of us.

Shihoe: ONE OF US ONE OF US

Iwhy: I'm leaving.

_Iwhy attempted to escape, but he couldn't._

Iwhy: How.

Takememe: It's apparently a contract.

Iwhy: ..Fine, as long as you kids don't drag me into anything dangerous.

StepOnMeUesugi: Hear that, Souji?

Chad: Me?? I would never.

Chad: He sounds like Dadjima, I can see why Akira warmed up to him so fast.

Akira: I feel safe :3c

Akira: Oh yeah, introductions.

Akira: Uuuh, let me start with the original Protagonist.

Akira: StepOnMeUesugi, Naoya Toudou, Earring Kink guy.

Akira: Tatsuya, Tatsuya Suou, Deja Vu boy.

Akira: Jun, Jun Kurosu, the purest one in the chat.

Jun: I'd give that title to Shiho, but thank you, Akira.

Akira: Minty, Minato Arisato. Lost his emotions in the cold war last Saturday.

Akira: (Literally) Death, Ryoji Mochizuki.

Akira: Chad, Souji Seta. We make fun of him but we really love him. He doesn't get what's going on most of the time.

Akira: Yosucce, Yosuke Hanamura. Really sweet and is trying his best.

Akira: Akira, Akira Kurusu. ;3c

Akira: Yusuke, Yusuke Kitagawa, my boyfriend. I love him with all of my heart and I'd kill for him.

Yusuke: That's very flattering, thank you, Akira.

Iwhy: So that's why you were smiling when you checked your phone, or whatever you call that face?

Shihoe: :3c

Akira: Absolutely.

Akira: Wait I'm not done.

Akira: Shihoe, Shiho Suzui. Second purest in the chat.

Akira: Annihalator, Ann Takamaki. Very chill.

Akira: I'm never typing this much again, time to recharge.

Yosucce: What?

_Tatsuya sent a photo._

Tatsuya: He fell asleep.

Jun: In.my arms i ca nt write properly

Iwhy: I see.

Takememe: What an intriguing group.

Iwhy: Well, if the kid is getting along with them, they cant be that bad.

Takememe: I agree.

Yusuke: Would you mind sending more photos of Akira? For reference, I mean

Annihalator: Stfu Yusuke you just want boyfriend pics

Yusuke: I'll neither deny nor confirm that statement.

_Tatsuya sent a file._

Yusuke: Thank you.

Tatsuya: You're welcome.

Minty: What do we do now?

Minty: Akira is recharging, we don't have a topic to talk about..

Tatsuya: I'd like to talk about my lord and saviour Jun, and how much I love him.

Jun: Tatsuya..

Tatsuya: ♥

Shihoe: AW

Shihoe: New rule!! No Jun hate, ever, not even the slightest jab. This is a Jun friendly server.

Chad: Understood!

Yosucce: Ily Souji

Chad: JAPNTOENHEIWB

Iwhy: I regret agreeing to staying.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll gladly add other characters, just ask!  
> But anyways, I really love all of the characters here but especially Shiho, Akira, Jun, and Tatsuya.


	6. Its not that gay if you suck your friends dick idk what you guys are trying to tell me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idk how to write Hidehiko but I love him with all of my heart and that's what's important, ok?  
> This is a big mess but im.really tires it really is 3 in the morning  
> I want to write more of Hiko but I keep getting distracted and iiiiii eeee iiiii will always looove yoooou

Akira: Hey guys I'm mad at Na-chan so guess what I'm doing?

StepOnMeUesugi: What?

_Akira added UwUsugi_

UwUsugi: I know what all of you are thinking, "Thanks for hte dick UwUsugi" and honestly no problem

UwUsugi: Who is StepOnMeUesugi?

Akira: Well

StepOnMeUesugi: Aki

Akira: Its

StepOnMeUesugi: AKI NO

StepOnMeUesugi: I'M SORRY

UwUsugi: I'll just read up if he doesnt tell me ww

Akira: N

UwUsugi: Naoya?

StepOnMeUesugi: I can explain?

UwUsugi: well, its not gay to suck you friends dick

Minty: Yes it is.

StepOnMeUesugi: Shut up Minato

Minty: I'll mute the others so you two can just.. Talk, if you want.

UwUsugi: there's something to talk about?

StepOnMeUesugi: Well you see..

UwUsugi: Go ahead 

StepOnMeUesugi: Well you see..

UwUsugi: You can do it

Akira: Cheering 4 u

Yusuke: It's not that hard.

Minty: Do it boy

StepOnMeUesugi: The thign i

UwUsugi: Cmon

StepOnMeUesugi: ily

UwUsugi: What? I cant hear you

StepOnMeUesugi: I lov y

Annihalator: Gay

Akira: Ann stfu this is beautiful

Monya: Stop crying pussy

StepOnMeUesugi: I cant do this properly with this username hn

_StepOnMeUesugi changed his name to Naonyoom_

Naonyoom: I love you, UwUSucci "Rawr XD" HideMyAssHikeHike

UwUsugi: I love you too Noot Noot "Earring Dick" To Do

Monya: Nvm I'm crying too

Akira: God

Chad: clap clap

Death: You two

Minty: should fuck.

Shihoe: Yay!!! 

Annihalator: That was really gay I ched a tear

Takememe: Apparently you did, since you seem to be rendered unable to spell.

Annihalator: Shhhh pretty doctor lady.

Takememe: P.. Pretty docotr lad.y.?

Shihoe: ^^^^^^

Akira: Hey Uesugi

Akira: Hey

Akira: ..Where did they go?

Naonyoom: mkin o

Akira: Ah.

Monya: I wanted to tell you to go to Mementos but I cried instead.

Takememe: What is a Mementos?

Yosucce: It's where they fight the small dick criminals.

Takememe: And "Palaces"?

Yosucce: The big dick criminals.

Iwhy: ???

Minty: GUN DADDY

Death: HELLO

Chad: Good morning, Gun Whisperer.

Iwhy: It's three in the morning. Shut up.

Iwhy: Especially you, Kurusu.

Akira: I was trying to do something nice for Uesugi.

Jun: I'm going to beat your ass.

Iwhy: "Purest one in the chat"?

Jun: I'm going to slightly tickle you with my fists multiple times.

Tatsuya: Come back to bed, what the hell?

Jun: I'll be right there I just need to pick this lock.

Akira: Excuse me?

Akira: Jun?

Akira: KWNDONWKSJRNRKjsowNIns

Iwhy: Don't beat him too hard, he's the source of most of my income.

Annihalator: SEND PICS MORGANA

_Monya sent an image_

Shihoe: Go get him, Jun-chan!

UwUsugi: whoop his ass flower boy

Minty: ??! Go back to macking on your boyfriend, Hidehiko.

Annihalator: Even while having his ass beat, he still :3c's.

Tatsuya: JUN NO.

_Monya sent an image_

Monya: Oh wait wrong picture.

Shihoe: Oh my..

_Monya sent an image_

Shihoe:  _Are they seriously bringing out guns._

Iwhy: I don't remember selling a gun like that to him?

Yosucce: You didn't. 

Chad: Let me tell all of you a secret of his, okay?

Chad: Akira keeps actual weapons in all of his jackets, blazers, button shirts.

Annihalator: WHY

Yosucce: "Aesthetic".

Minty: How come I wasn't told?

Yosucce: He pulled one out at Teddie when we were showing him around.

Tatsuya: EXCUSE ME?

Iwhy: Then why is he buying fake guns?

Akira: Because, these don't fill back up when I go out of the Metaverse, and that kinda sucks.

UwUsugi: Wtf Aki gimme one

Akira: You'll have to buy everyone in my team dinner.

UwUsugi: worth it??? Deal. In the morning

Akira: Deal.

Tatsuya: STOP ENABLING HIM, HIDEHIKO.

Iwhy: Why do you even have them, seriously?

Akira: Do you want to know?

Iwhy: That's why I asked, kid. Don't get smart with me.

Takememe: Can I have one?

Akira: You're paying half of the dinner, if you want one.

Takememe: Yes.

Tatsuya: I EXPECTED BETTER FROM YOU.

UwUsugi: Sick.

Akira: Okay.. The reason I have them is..

Akira: IIIIIS..

Death: Is it because of the cliffhanger?

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kagome kagome who is behind that bithc


	7. NPC guy.

Naonyoom: I went to visit Akira and I'm somewhat amazed by how no one has noticed the CAT in his desk.

Akira: NPC guy probably noticed.

Annihalator: That wasn't even a visit, you just stared into our homeroom and then said "bitchin".

UwUsugi: he has a cat in his desk?

Monya: Yeah my name's Morgana.

Akira: Thanks for the cakes???? I'm guessing Katsuya sent them??????

Naonyoom: He did.

Akira: @Tatsuya tell Katsuya I'm grateful.

Tatsuya: Alright.

* * *

 

Hey, what happened with the guns? You may ask yourself.

**You haven't unlocked that information yet.**

* * *

 

Naonyoom: Your classmates are dicks though, I hate them already.

Naonyoom: "Delinquent" my ass.

Chad: Wtf I'll take your place 

Akira: Please do.

Akira: Soon enough.. I'll.. I'll..

Akira: I'll begin reciting Shakespeare..

Takememe: Oof.

Shihoe: Takemi did you just oof in this Pure and Golden and Soft Persona user server?

Iwhy: What the hell's a Persona?

UwUsugi: It's like a furrsona but better and purer.

Yosucce: FURRSONA BUT BETTER AND PURER

Yosucce: Blocked, reported, uninvited from my FUNeral.

Chad: ..I kinda want to meet NPC guy.

Annihalator: I think his name is ⭐♠♦⭕✔♦✖

Chad: Hm.. Fairly normal name. A true NPC.

Akira: Sometimes I catch him staring at me and it scares me because he'll try to sell us out and I don't want anything to happen to you guys.

Annihalator: You should be worrying about yourself, what the hell?

Akira: It's fine if it's just me, but I don't want anything to happen to you guys.

Yosucce: ??? It's fine if it's just you ????? 

Yosucce: Are you for real?????

Akira: Pretty much.

Chad: I have an objection, your honor.

Shihoe: Proceed.

Chad: Akira Kurusu, also known as "Nasty Crimeboy" would never do anything wrong ever. And doesnt deserve any sort of misfortune.

Shihoe: That is correct and you win the case whomever was on the "Akira is mean >:(" side is sentenced to death.

Yusuke: I support that result wholeheartedly.

Akira: !!

Shihoe: And so that mcmotherfucker knows this

_Shihoe added NPC69_

NPC69: Nani

Shihoe: U bitch

NPC69: Shiho?

Shihoe: No, its your MOM.

Akira: Why do you have the NPC's number?

Shihoe: I am the all-seeing eye.

Naonyoom: I thought that was Shido?

Annihalator: Shido Shiho

Annihalator: Pls dont be Ian Hawke; Uncovered, Shiho. Ily.

NPC69: What's going on?

Jun: This is the guy who sits behind Akira?

NPC69: I am, what about him? Isn't he just some delinquent? Are you here to kill me?

Naonyoom: I'm going to beat your ass for that.

Tatsuya: I will slay you with my own two hands if you dare utter those words again.

Takememe: Oof.

Minty: Shhh, Yusuke will get to him faster.

Yusuke: I sure will.

Shihoe: Scary.

NPC69: I'm sorry, I don't follow?

Jun: Have you noticed any strange behaviour from him?

NPC69: You mean the cat, the texts about The Phantom Thieves, and the lockpicks?

Shihoe: So he did notice!!! 

Jun: Your thoughts about these things?

NPC69: So that's how it is.. I don't plan on selling him out, if that's what you wanted to ask.

NPC69: Plus,

NPC69: the cat's cute.

Monya: My name is Morgana, and I am NOT a cat. I'm not cute!!

NPC69: What?

Minty: You get used to it.

NPC69: Okay?

Akira: Is that the truth?

NPC69: Yeah, you guys changed Kamoshida's heart, our entire school kinda owes you guys after that haha.

Akira: Is that so? Then I'm glad.

UwUsugi: THE NPC IS ONE OF US NOW

Yusuke: ONE OF US ONE OF US

Tatsuya: ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US

Jun: ONE OF US ONE OF US

Shihoe: ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US

Monya: Poor boy.. He looked like he was ready to have a breakdown.

NPC69: He sounds strangely nice, I thought he was some sort of a demon?

Akira: :( 

Takememe: Absolutely not.

Yusuke: Never.

NPC69: Well then.. I guess I was wrong. I'll try to get to know him, if you'd like.

Naonyoom: I will hold back on the ass kicking for another day..

NPC69: I'll take that as a yes?

Naonyoom: Yes.

UwUsugi: dont hold back when it comes to it 

Iwhy: So.. A delinquent, huh?

Akira: Yeah, I'm a real criminal as you can see.

UwUsugi: you pet every dog you see though

Akira: So do you.

UwUsugi: Is this a call-out post?

Akira: It is.

_Monya sent an image_

UwUsugi: Saved for future reference.

Iwhy: I somehow doubt the kid would do anything delinquent-like.

Minty: Gun daddy is right.

Yusuke: Pfft.

Akira: Keep smiling and being happy, I love you.

Yusuke: I love you too, I can sense pure power in this photo.

Annihalator: It's just him Jojo posing at Mochizuki-kun stop

Minty: I must say, he looks absolutely ravishing in this photo.

Annihalator: Yusuke and Minato gaze longingly at this photo of their boyfriends, wondering "Oh! Why cant that be me? Wrapped in their warm embrace."

Minty: Shu t up.

Yusuke: She isn't wrong.

Minty: Yeah but.. I don't want anyone to know that.

Jun: We already do.

UwUsugi: ^^^^

NPC69: Kurusu-kun is a chuuni?

Jun: Yes.

Akira: Wh

Annihalator: No he's a Jojo fan clearly

Akira: I don't like where this is going.

NPC69: Oh I see, that's how it is.. :^)

Monya: What's Jojo?

Yusuke: I'd like to know, as well.

Yosucce: Good fucking shit

Akira: Yosuke-senpai, no profanity in this pure and good chatroom.

NPC69: ^^

NPC69: Yosuke-senpai?

Akira: Yeah.

NPC69: I seem to learn something new every day.

NPC69: Also, you guys haven't watched Jojo? Disappointing.

Monya: Well as you can see, I'm a cat.

Yusuke: I'm broke.

Jun: I've never touched a computer or a TV in my life.

_Akira sent an image_

NPC69: How is he typing!?

Monya: With my paws you fool, you absolute buffoon.

Akira: Mona, be nice.

Monya: You dummy.

Akira: Better.

NPC69: yyy y wh at

UwUsugi: Akiras cat isnt a cat, he can talk but you cant hear him if your mind hasnt registered his voice in the Shadow Hooker Clubs

_NPC69 logged out, bitchbaby._

Monya: I'm so amazing he was unable to comprehend it.

Akira: Mhm! 

Monya: You know what else he is unable to comprehend? This cliffhanger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I dont even like Jojo but I think the similarities are kinda cool  
> I want NPC guy to be my friend


	8. Divine Titties

_Tatsuya sent an image_

Annihalator: She's?? Really pretty.

Annihalator: Who is she? 

Shihoe: Those are some DIVINE TITTIES.

Tatsuya: Lisa.

Tatsuya: "I know they're divine" -Lisa

Jun: I don't know how to feel about her breasts being called divine.

Tatsuya: "Let me be complimented, Jun!" -Lisa

Naonyoom: ADD HER

Shihoe: ADD HER ADD HER

Annihalator: Add her add her add her!

_Tatsuya added Lisa⭐Lisa_

Lisa⭐Lisa: *Sunglasses Emoji*

Akira: You don't type Sunglasses Emoji.

Lisa⭐Lisa: *Sad Emoji*

NPC69: Who is this?

Lisa⭐Lisa: its your boy uuuhh,, skinny penis

Akira: Lisa-senpai, no.

Lisa⭐Lisa: Lisa-senpai yEAH

Lisa⭐Lisa: ABOUT my divine titties, thank u, these HEATHENS cant accept that theyre the best

Shihoe: You're welcome!! 

Jun: Lisa, please.

Lisa⭐Lisa: Jun!! Hello!

Jun: Good evening.

Yusuke: GGGG I!m inari and graphic design is my PASSION

Jun: ???

Yusuke: I SURE do LOVE eating paint

Annihalator: Futaba, give Yusuke his phone back.

Yusuke: Add me and I will.

_Annihalator added MemeSUCC_

Annihalator: Now give it back.

MemeSUCC: Ye boi

MemeSUCC: I have to wait until he's done staring at Akira

MemeSUCC: HEY BET YOU GUYS I CAN STACK A BUNCH OF THINGS ON YUSUKE WHILE HES OUT OF IT? BRB

Annihalator: FUTABA NO

Lisa⭐Lisa: wait for me ill be there in about 5 minutes

MemeSUCC: I have a head-start

Tatsuya: Don't hurt yourselves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I started and then I gave up to make curry?? I'll continue tomorrow oh my god I'm so sorry??????


	9. Knowing you, you'd probably suck Light Yagami's dick.

_Akira has added Akechi Goro_

Chad: Akira..

Lisa⭐Lisa: sweetie..

Minty: Don't do this to yourself, Akira.

Shihoe: What's going on?

Annihalator: He's grieving.

Shihoe: Huh? Oh.. Is Akechi..?

Lisa⭐Lisa: yea..

Akira: It's fine.

Akechi Goro: Yeah, lmao.

Annihalator: WAIT NANI THE FUCK

Shihoe: !!!!!

Chad: YO

Yosucce: WOAH.

Akechi Goro: I lived bitch.

Yusuke: We found him on the street.

Takememe: I still don't understand how you could have shot yourself, but at the same time it wasn't you that shot you?

Akechi Goro: Imagine another you, but from someone elses perspective. And then that cognitive version of you shoots you. But you survive because you sneezed and it just shot your shoulder.

Chad: THE BOY LIVES

_Takememe changed Akechi Goro's nickname to "Yagami Light"_

Yagami Light: Oof

Naonyoom: !!!! Oof? In MY server?

Yagami Light: I was unaware Akira had any other friends besides his Dick Circle.

Akira: Do you want to meet them?

Yagami Light: Maybe.

Akira: Give me a straight answer you Tsundere.

Yagami Light: _

NPC69: Wait, you know Akechi-kun?

Akira: I know a gun dealer, a gun snorter, and a politician, and yet you're surprised by this?

NPC69: Kinda??? Dude,,,, 

Yagami Light: Some might call it fate.

Yusuke: Don't flirt with my boyfriend, please.

Shihoe: Ooooo

Yagami Light: Oh no, I wouldn't even dream of it. Should I call it "plot convenience" instead?

Yusuke: Yes.

Yagami Light: Some might call it plot convenience.

UwUsugi: Pot convenience, SSSSUUCc

Jun: Delete that. Delete that right now.

UwUsugi: youre not my mom you cant tell me waht to do

Tatsuya: Listen to your mother, Hidehiko.

UwUsugi: :( ok daddy

Shihoe: That's kinky!!

MemeSUCC: Necrophilia is kinky, too.

NPC69: HRKEHKFJDJ EJ D R GK

Death: OKAY!! I have a

Minty: Hot take? Go on.

Chad: Continue

Death: You guys..

Death: Could have just asked me if

Minty: if we wanted to know if Akechi was dead?

Death: Yes.

Akira: ..I never thought of that.

Monya: ..You... You thought of literally everything else.. Except for that?

Akira: I was sad shut up.

Yagami Light: Sad? Why would you be sad?

Naonyoom: You're one of us!! A pal, a chum, a friend. 

Yagami Light: Even though I literally murdered some of his friends relatives..?

UwUsugi: nobody forgives you for that. 

Yagami Light: Thanks??

NPC69: Wait, what?

Yusuke: Akechi was the one behind all of the mental shutdown cases, he was the one who killed Okumura.

NPC69: And you guys don't even care?

Akira: It's not that we don't care..

NPC69: The what is it?

Akira: He was used.. Just like we were. Put through that same awful treatment by the corrupt adults, like we were. We sympathize, but we don't forgive.

Yagami Light: That's a foolish way to think, Akira.

Akira: You know what else was foolish? The pancake thing.

Yagami Light: ONE mistake. I made ONE mistake.

Akira: One mistake too many.

Yagami Light: Do you want to fight?

Akira: Put em up.

Yusuke: This is very funny to me.

Lisa⭐Lisa: same, they are like children.

Shihoe: Maybe me and Ann should have children...

Annihalator: SHIHO

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to add more characters in the tags.  
> Oh um!! This was purely for my own satisfaction, I was sad when he died so!!!   
> My brain was like.. Half working while I wrote this.  
> Expect ACTUAL updates in April.


	10. I see you everywhere and it's really weird, stop teleporting.

NPC69: Hey guys, guess what.

Naonyoom: Nani nani desuka??

Minty: Shoot me.

NPC69: Stop being an emo, Arisato-kun.

NPC69: Anyways, I went to buy flowers for my girlfriend because that's what friends do. I saw Akira, since he apparently works there.

NPC69: Then I went to the Beef Bowl place and he apparently works THERE too?

Akira: But I was in the Flower shop all Evening. You must be mistaking me for someone else.

Annihalator: No, it happened to me too.

Tatsuya: It's his brother.

NPC69: The guy.. Has a twin? Or does he just look like Akira?

Akira: What the fuck is Kylo Ren Mamma Mia doing in Tokyo.

Annihalator: Kylo Ren who

Jun: Akira that's rude.

Akira: :(

Tatsuya: Ask him yourself, if you want to know. He just left without telling us.

_Akira added Ren_

Ren: Oh dear brother of mine, to what do I owe this pleasure?

Akira: Why are you in Tokyo.

Ren: ..Straight to the point, as always. 

Ren: I missed you.

Shihoe: Aw

Akira: You.. Missed me?

Ren: It's not weird for me to miss my own brother.

Akira: 

Ren: I can feel you doing that stupid smile of yours, stop it.

Akira: 

Akira: 

Yusuke: I can feel it too, somehow.

Akira: Brother dearest~ You could have just told me!

Annihalator: BROTHER DEAREST

NPC69: YO WHAT.

Naonyoom: What a sweet family reunion.

Lisa⭐Lisa: Ya i'm crying

Yusuke: This is a rather beautiful display of brotherly love.

Ren: Don't say it like that!

Akira: I'm just teasing.

Akira: You shouldn't have come to Tokyo, though. 

Akira: It's dangerous.

Ren: You say that, but I was the one who always protected you, no?

Akira: Of course. That's why I want to protect you in return.

Yusuke: You two seem to care about each other a great deal.

Akira: Without Ren I would have stayed as the coward I was when I was a child. I protected that woman because that was what he would have done.

Yusuke: Is that so?

Ren: As flattering as that is.. I'm disappointed that you got CAUGHT.

Yagami Light: Same.

Akira: I'm not. I got to meet Morgana, Ryuji, Ann, and everyone. So I'm glad. Akechi counts too.

Akira: I got to fall in love with Yusuke, as well. And I'm glad.

Annihalator: That's gross and sweet thanka

Akira: Thanka

Annihalator: Don't bully me

Yusuke: I love you too.

Akira: I'm happy, I'm very very happy. 

NPC69: You two seem to love each other quite a bit. It's nice.

Minty: You've grown, Akira.

Minty: I know what Ryoji is about to type and I want no part in it.

Death: Woah??? Feelings??? From AKIRA????? When did this happen?

Akira: Yusuke watered my dead crop of a heart.

Ren: That's gay.

Akira: Wanna see how gay I can be?

Annihalator: NO

Shihoe: Kinda

Ren: YEah.

Akira: Morgana is telling me to sleep :^(

Yusuke: Sleep with me.

Akira: KWBEKENNDKDJNEND

Akira: ..Can I?

Ren: HAH

Yusuke: Of course.

Naonyoom: So indecent~ 

Monya: Akira stop being gay.

Monya: AKIRA!

Monya: AKIRA GET BACK HERE!

Akira: I'm sorry but my gay has awoken and now it wont go to sleep.

Monya: ..He's so dramatic.

NPC69: He's kinda sweet. Going after his husband like that.

Annihalator: HUSBAND?

Tatsuya: Since when? Why wasn't I invited?

NPC69: Oh.. Are they not married?

Yusuke: Aha, not yet.

NPC69: Ah, sorry.

Jun: Honest mistake.

NPC69: But it'll happen soon, wont it?

Jun: I cant help but hope so.

Ren: Can I be inside the cake?

Yusuke: Absolutely.

Akira: Do it.

Jun: Ahaha, it'd be best for you two to save this talk for later.

Death: I wish we were that in love :(

Minty: We finish

Death: each others sentences? I know. I just want to show you

Minty: How much you love me more than you already do? Then go ahead.

Death: JQNSNLEKE

Death:  _This message has been blocked_

Death:  _This message has been blocked_

Death:  _This message has been blocked_

Death:  _This message has been blocked_

UwUsugi: I cant believe this, what did he write?

Jun: Oh dear..

Tatsuya: I feel violated, somehow.

NPC69: Was it

NPC69: Was it sexual?

Death: Of course not!

Death: Partly.

Death: I thought this was a free chat :'(

Naonyoom: That wasn't pure in the slightest!!

NPC69: What did he say!?

Naonyoom: He said..

Naonyoom:  _This message has been blocked_

Chad: Why is Minato laughing so hard?

Chad: Jesus CHRIST

Akira: Are you with Minato right now, Souji?

Chad: Oh, yeah. 

Chad: He says he loves you, btw, Ryoji.

Death: I love him very much too!!

Shihoe: I love Ann Takamaki!!!!

Akira: I love Yusuke Kitagawa with my heart and soul, I'd die without him!

Jun: I love Tatsuya Suou with all of my heart!

UwUsugi: I love Naoya Toudou!

Chad: I love Yosuke Hanamura, and I always will!

Yusuke: A

Annihalator: HNNN

Minty: My crops have healed.

Tatsuya: Ah

Naonyoom: ANGHEHHHHGH

Yosucce: HBHHHHHJJSKBF

NPC69: Oh my god are you guys okay?

Annihalator: I will be. I don't know about everyone else.

Takememe: I diagnose all of you with "Whipped AF".

Naonyoom: YOURE NOT WRONG

Lisa⭐Lisa: guyyyys you broke chinyan pls stop ruining my fun

Iwhy: Stop spamming, please.

Iwhy:

Iwhy: What happened here?

Yagami Light: It seems they are appreciating each other.

Ren: Yeah it's gross.

Naonyoom: Stfu you have the hots for your brother

Ren: It's NORMAL to want to protect your siblings!

Naonyoom: Idk seems suspicious to me.

Iwhy: Whatever, just don't do anything reckless.

Ren: Is this the Gun Daddy?

Akira: Yes.

Iwhy: Who are you?

Akira: My brother.

Annihalator: ABOUT that. Why weren't we told you had a brother, a TWIN brother exactly?

Akira: You never asked.

Yusuke: I thought everyone else already knew so I never brought it up.

Annihalator: You KNEW?

Yusuke: Yes, I'm his boyfriend, Ann.

Annihalator: Fair enough.

Iwhy: The kid has a twin?

Ren: Yeah but I'm prettier.

Akira: Somehow cockier too.

Iwhy: That's possible?

Akira: That's rude.

Ren: Roast my brother more please.

Takememe: Well I cant say "no" to a please.

Akira: Please dont.

Takememe: Suddenly I cant read. 

Ren: HAH

Naonyoom: REKT

UwUsugi: Ily but never say rekt ever again

Naonyoom: That's fair.

Naonyoom: Now give me your bank details.

UwUsugi: Sure!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kept accidentally writing this in Japanese because I'm really tired?  
> I seem to focus a lot of my chapters around Akira, though. I like all of the protagonists a lot, but I feel like him and Tatsuya were the most fleshed out? After I'm done talking about Akira, I'll probably move on to Tatsuya or Minato.
> 
> Oh, when I was writing in Japanese, instead of "Daisuki" or "Aishiteru", I used "Koishiteru". I didn't get to reference it in this chapter, since it wouldn't have made much sense to English readers. So instead of "You guys care about each other enough to use such a strong word?" which wouldn't have made much sense, I had NPC-kun say "You two seem to love each other quite a bit."  
> I wrote the rest after remembering I'm writing in English haha.
> 
> Anyways, I kind of liked this chapter, so I thought I'd give you guys my thought process behind it. I hope you enjoy.


	11. Speaking of brothers Naoya's is dead

_Ren changed Akira's name to "Triple Gay"_

Triple Gay: Jokes on you I'm okay with this.

_Ren changed his own name to "Quadruple Gay"_

Quadruple Gay: I'm still better than you.

Triple Gay: Yeah at being older, you OLD man.

Quadruple Gay: I'm only a few minutes older.

Triple Gay: And I'm surprised your hair isn't greying yet.

Naonyoom: Ah yes, the world of sibling rivalry.

Naonyoom: At like, ass o'clock.

Monya: Akira go the fufk to sleep

Triple Gay: fufk

Monya: I will beat your ass

MemeSUCC: kinky

Monya: FUTABA

MemeSUCC: Whoops back to lurking

Tatsuya: Please go to sleep.

Quadruple Gay: I don't think I'll be able to.

Jun: Sleep or else I'll make you sleep.

Quadruple Gay: Understandable have a nice day.

Naonyoom: You know this is nice because my twin brother is dead.

UwUsugi: I'm sorry for your loss, sweetie

Naonyoom: OWNRKEJNE SWEETIE

Naonyoom: Um, anyways. Thanks? But I don't know, I have mixed feelings about it.

Shihoe: Don't feel forced to talk about it if you don't want to.

Naonyoom: No, it's fine.

Triple Gay: Kazuya passed the earring kink onto Naoya, his last words.. "Live for the earring".

Naonyoom: JSKSBORJD AKIRA

Annihalator: AKIRA TACT

Triple Gay: I'm really sorry that was insensitive of me, but the earring does have something related to him, doesn't it?

Naonyoom: It's fine. I pierced my ear to remind myself and my mother, in a way, that I'm not him. 

Chad: Nothing good comes from denying your true self, Naoya.

Naonyoom: STOP YOU'RE GIVING ME AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS

UwUsugi: It wasn't your fault, you know that.

Naonyoom: He wanted to do something nice for me, and so, it is my fault.

MemeSUCC: I don't think that's right at all. You weren't the one who killed him directly, and it was his choice whether or not he wanted to do something nice or not.

MemeSUCC: Making like a tree and lurking once more.

Naonyoom: That's... Thank you.

Naonyoom: I wanted to make a joke but instead I had to say such things.. I feel closer with you all, somehow.

Triple Gay: Hey meet me in Leblanc in the morning?

Naonyoom: Okay??

* * *

 

* * *

_Phantom Thieves' chat_

Joker: Hey guys.

Joker: Hey hey hey guys.

Skull: since when were u the one who started conversations

Joker: Since now.

Queen: What is it that you want at midnight, exactly?

Joker: Is everyone here?

Fox: Indeed.

Navi: I have a feeling I kno what he wants ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Panther: Is this about the thing that just happened?

_Joker has added Crow_

Joker: You're doing this too.

Crow: Damn.

Queen: ??? He's alive?????

Fox: Indeed he is.

Joker: That's not what's important right now.

Joker: I'd like to ask for a favour from all of you.

Noir: A favour? 

Joker: So you know how I have a twin brother?

Skull: EFFIN NO WHAT

Joker: Haha, anyways.

Joker: I have a friend whom also had a twin brother, except he's dead.

Queen: My condolences.

Noir: Oh my.. I'm sorry.

Joker: Ah, yeah.. I wanted to comfort him, maybe? And also thank him, for being there for everyone.

Queen: And you want us to..?

Joker: Help me to help him? This isn't very well thought out.

Fox: I have no problems with it.

Skull: im down

Panther: I want to help Naoya-kun, too!

Queen: Naoya-kun? Is that his name?

Panther: Mhm, me and Yusuke met him already.

Noir: I'd be glad to help! 

Joker: Great meet me at Leblanc 4:20 PM.

Skull: wait why havent i met him

Joker: You never asked to join the squad?

Crow: Neither did I? I was forced into it.

Joker: That's because we found you on the street, now shhh.

Queen: About that

Joker: Whoops gotta scram

* * *

* * *

 

Minty: Okay, Tatsuya.

Tatsuya: Yeah?

Minty: Jun, Souji, Ren.

Tatsuya: Jun.

Minty: And leave the rest to die?

Tatsuya: Absolutely.

Quadruple Gay: That's understandable, Jun is the only one worth saving.

Jun: That's not true! 

Chad: :(

Naonyoom: Come on, Souji deserves at least some credit. He's a wildcard.

Chad: :)

Quadruple Gay: Nah.

Chad: :/

Triple Gay: ?

Chad: Oh, Akira! You're back. Your brother is an ass.

Triple Gay: I know.

Shihoe: We still love you Souji-kun!

Yosucce: ^^^

Chad: Than;;k you;;;;

NPC69: While this is sweet.. Aren't you supposed to be sleeping?

Annihalator: It's Sunday so no

Yusuke: I have painted something truly beautiful.

Death: Pics or it didn't happen

_Yusuke has sent an image_

Death: You're right, it's stunning.

Minty: Absolutely magnificent.

Shihoe: It's.. A lobster.

Yusuke: It is a lobster, yes.

Shihoe: I understand how Akira can be so infatuated with Kitagawa.

Yusuke: Thank you???

Triple Gay: I still don't understand how you can be so infatuated with Ann, though.

Annihalator: HEY

Triple Gay: I'm kidding I'm sorry please dont hurt me

Annihalator: You shall live for another day.

Tatsuya: Why were you gone for so long?

Triple Gay: Oh haha will you look at the time I should be sleeping.


	12. I speak more in this chat because I hate not feeling invisible.

Quadruple Gay: I should transfer to Shujin instead of calling in sick for literal months.

Triple Gay: No.

Annihalator: No no, I like where this is going.

Quadruple Gay: Okay hear me out KiraKira.

Triple Gay: I refuse.

Quadruple Gay: Then shall I visit instead? Every single day.

Triple Gay: Don't. Please.

Minty: I wanna visit too.

Triple Gay: If either of you show up abywhere near Shujin I'm throwing down.

* * *

* * *

 

Triple Gay: What did I tell you?

Quadruple Gay: Go to Shujin.

Triple Gay: N

Quadruple Gay: These NPC's are really mean what did you do to deserve that?

Triple Gay: I don't know, I apparently beat up a orphan goat. Or something on that level.

Triple Gay: Please never go to Shujin again.

Annihalator: Or what? You'll push him down the stairs again?

Triple Gay: I wont hesitate.

Naonyoom: Wait he pushed him down the stairs?

UwUsugi: Pics or it didn't happen.

_Annihalator has sent an image_

_Annihalator has sent an image_

_Annihalator has sent an image_

_Monya has sent an image_

_NPC69 has sent a video_

Lisa⭐Lisa: why is tatsuya laughing?

Lisa⭐Lisa: HAH the second one is my new icon

Quadruple Gay: Next time I'm posing as you >:( 

Triple Gay: I'll pose as you, then.

NPC69: I'll stream it, dont worry guys

Minty: Thanks you're an angel, bless you.

NPC69: :)

Takememe: Send me the link.

Naonyoom: ^^

__

* * *

* * *

 

Annihalator: The fact that Kawakami was immediately suspicious is kind of amazing.

Triple Gay: She knows I keep weapons in my blazer.

Shihoe: ??? Why????

UwUsugi: I do too!

Naonyoom: Why????????

Minty: I hide food in my uniform, mostly.

Yosucce: Minato I can understand, but weapons?

UwUsugi: What else would I hide in pockets?

Yosucce: ??? Pencils??????

UwUsugi: Good idea, nobody would ever think you'd use those as a weapon

Yosucce: @SetaSouji

Yosucce: Please do something.

Chad: Akira what do you have?

Triple Gay: A knife!

Chad: No!

Yosucce: I ASK YOU TO HELP AND YOU REPAY ME WITH MEDIOCRE VINES

Chad: Okay that's rude, it's a funny vine.

Triple Gay: ifunny.co

Jun: ifunny.co

Quadruple Gay: ifunny.co

Minty: ifunny.co

Yusuke: ifunny.co

Death: ifunny.co

UwUsugi: ifunny.co

Tatsuya: ifunny.co

Annihalator: ifunny.co

Shihoe: ifunny.co

NPC69: ifunny.co

Lisa⭐Lisa: ifunny.co

Takememe: ifunny.co

Iwhy: ifunny.co

Yosucce: Iwai too!?

Iwhy: ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

Triple Gay: Hah.

Chad: Lmao god damn.

Yosucce: I expected Jun and Tatsuya to be more mature.

Tatsuya: If you still think I'm mature you're probably blind and/or deaf.

Jun: I thought it was amusing.

Naonyoom: You thought me falling out of a tree was amusing, :(

NPC69: Is everyone here insane or??

Chad: Ann, Shiho, Akira(partly), Minato, and Naoya are sane.

Triple Gay: Partly?

Chad: I've seen you jump out of windows and call it "Parkour".

Minty: I wouldn't call everyone else insane, just special.

Minty: Except for Souji.

Minty: He's especially insane.

Chad: I have never done anything crazy in my life.

Yosucce: You fell in love with me, went into the TV world in a girls uniform AND a swimming suit, rejected Rise for me, I think I've seen you inhale soda before?

Minty: I don't think him falling for you was crazy, you're a great guy, I think.

Death: V cute^

Triple Gay: In a girls uniform? Why cant I do that?

MemeSUCC: Because your mom gay

Quadruple Gay: Because your mom gay

MemeSUCC: Yoot boy dont steal my line

Quadruple Gay: twas my line up until you STOLE it like you stole my brother >:(

MemeSUCC: Finders keepers

Triple Gay: I'm pretty sure I was the one who found you?

Chad: I found a cat.

Minty: Pics or it didnt happen.

_Chad has sent an image_

Monya: >:'( 

Monya: Wish that was me.

Chad: Run away with me, Morgana.

Monya: Goodbye, Akira. You were a good pal.

Triple Gay: Time to stay up until half past nine.

Monya: BITCH

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For some reason I was very bitter while writing this chapter and it probably shows, I'm sorry.  
> I try to drag out whatever I say online because I never speak, and when I do it's just five words? I have to do the same while writing, but my chapters are always short either way, I'm really sorry about that??


	13. It's because Atlus thinks you're irrelevant

Naonyoom: Atlus better give us the dancing game spin-off we deserve.

Tatsuya: I don't want a dancing game spin-off?

Naonyoom: I do :(

_Quadruple Gay changed Yagami Light's name to "That Bitch"_

That Bitch: Excuse me?

Quadruple Gay: You heard me.

Triple Gay: You know, I didn't want one either.

Naonyoom: See! They should have given it to me! 

Naonyoom: Maybe I should send the trailer to the each of your schools in a response of rebellion.

Triple Gay: I will skin you alive.

Minty: I'll do it first.

Yusuke: I don't see what's so bad about that? Wouldn't that improve your reputation, Akira?

Triple Gay: That's the best case scenario.

Shihoe: I was looking at Ann the entire time, but I thought you two were cute!

Triple Gay: I don't want other people to think I'm cute.

Yusuke: You are, though.

Chad: Spin and smile.

Triple Gay: Fight me in Crossroa ds

Naonyoom: I wish I had this sort of attention, it'd be great, just stop acting like I'm irrelevant, Atlus.

UwUsugi: Is our love not enough, Na-chan?

Naonyoom: It's more than enough, I just want daddy Atlus to notice me.

Minty: God I wish I had a dad..

Jun: You do now.

Death: ??????

_Jun sent an image_

Jun: Soon.

Triple Gay: Me??? And Ren?????? Too?????

Quadruple Gay: ;-; Daddy

Jun: Son.

Tatsuya: I don't understand?

Jun: We're going to custody battle their parents so hard they wont be able to walk a step. They shall feel like glass, the shall break.

Annihalator: Okay, I have a question.

Jun: Go ahead.

Annihalator: What the fuck?

Iwhy: I'd like to ask the same question.

Minty: It's.. It's justice, just go along with it.

Death: I'm 

Minty: Scared? Yeah, me too.

Tatsuya: ..Down boy.

Jun: Yes, Tatsuya.

Tatsuya: Good.

Jun: Hnnhnhnnjjnn

Yusuke: Is this.. Pet play?

Triple Gay: Wh

Triple Gay: Who taught you that?

MemeSUCC: Oh no

Triple Gay: Futaba?

Yusuke: Futaba gave me "The Talk" when she found out that I am in love with you. 

Triple Gay:  _Futaba?_

MemeSUCC: Look you would have done it sooner or later.

Triple Gay: FUTABA.

Jun: Oh dear..

Triple Gay: I am very disappointed in you, you should have let me do it.

Takememe: Oh thank god, I thought he was going to kill her.

That Bitch: I dont think he'd risk getting caught.

MemeSUCC: You'd be surprised.

Naonyoom: What's pet play?

UwUsugi: I'll teach you.

Lisa⭐Lisa: Down boy.

UwUsugi: No.

Naonyoom: ??? Okay??

UwUsugi: Great come over

Minty: ..Naoya doesn't know what pet play is?

Tatsuya: It seems.. Surprisingly, he doesn't.

Minty: I feel like that's a lie and he just wants something from Uesugi.

UwUsugi: ;^)

Iwhy: Horny teenagers..

Takememe: Horny teenagers.

Takememe: Oh, hey.

Takememe: Will you look at that?

Iwhy: No.

Takememe: :^(

Triple Gay: :^)

Takememe: :^)

Quadruple Gay: Why does my brother have so many hot friends, that's not fair.

Triple Gay: Because I'm not a bitch like you.

Quadruple Gay: :( At least introduce me to the dude bro, he's cute.

Monya: Dude bro? 

Triple Gay: Ryuji.

Monya: Disgusting.

MemeSUCC: The Kurusu's succ the boys on the Phantom Thief team.

Quadruple Gay: I'm not a Kurusu.

Yusuke: How so?

Triple Gay: His name is Ren Mamma Mia

Quadruple Gay: Wow fuck off, it's Amamiya.

Triple Gay: Don't tell me to fuck off, Riri.

Quadruple Gay: Aki.

Triple Gay: Riri Riri Riri

Quadruple Gay: AKI AKI AKI

Triple Gay: FUCK YOU

Quadruple Gay: No, FUCK YOU

NPC69: ..I'm "leaking" this conversation to our class.

Annihalator: Do it.

Triple Gay: Please don't.

Quadruple Gay: DO IT. MAKE HIM SUFFER.

Triple Gay: Nobody asked you Riri.

Quadruple Gay: Nobody asked you to be such a little bitch either, Aki.

Triple Gay: Wow you know what the cards tell me?

Tatsuya: Stop fighting, please.

Quadruple Gay: What do they tell you?

Chad: I know what to do, give me a minute.

_Chad has added Nanako and Katsuya_

Triple Gay: THEY'RE TELLING ME THAT REN AMAMIYA IS A BITCH

Katsuya: Rumour has it, if you say Ren Amamiya six times, Akira Kurusu will show up to call you a bitch.

Nanako: Are they fighting?

Triple Gay: !!! 

Triple Gay: No haha no of course not, it's just harmless banter.

Quadruple Gay: Hahhahahahab ily bro 

Nanako: Can I call big bro a bitch too?

Chad: OWBRKRHJRHR

Yosucce: Absolutely.

Chad: YOSUKE

Yosucce: Yes, honey?

Chad: Don't try to hide your betrayal with love.

Yosucce: I love you lots

Chad: Don

Yosucce: With my heart and soul

Chad: D

Yosucce: I love you the most

Chad:

Chad: I love you too.

Nanako: thats gay.

Death: LMAO NANAKO

Triple Gay: Nanako where did you hear that?

Nanako: daddy called them that when they went up to big bros room and then i looked up what it meant

Nanako: i agree

Chad: Nanako please

Nanako: i think its cute

Shihoe: She's adorable can we keep her?

Quadruple Gay: How about it, dad?

Jun: She can stay.

Tatsuya: What about Katsuya?

Jun: Do you have a peace offering, Katsuya?

Katsuya: I think me not ripping into you for doing my brother is enough of a peace offering.

Jun: Aha, that's fair. He can stay.

Iwhy: Who is Nanako?

Triple Gay: The smallest, purest child in the entire world.

Nanako: :D

MemeSUCC: I thought that was me!?

Triple Gay: No.

Yosucce: Yeah lol Nanako cant be beat.

Nanako: >:)

MemeSUCC: !!!!

Chad: How sweet.

Minty: So pure.

Yusuke: Why are you !!!, Futaba?

MemeSUCC: Do you guys not see that!? The >:)

Monya: ..You're tired, Futaba.

Triple Gay: Are you okay, Futaba?

MemeSUCC: Jfc

Nanako: miss futaba-chan are you ok?

MemeSUCC: :eyes:

Nanako: um.. miss futaba-chan?

Yosucce: Don't mind her, Nanako-chan.

Naonyoom: So um..

Quadruple Gay: How did it gooo?

UwUsugi: UwU

Katsuya: What?

UwUsugi: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Katsuya: Gross, that's shameless.

Naonyoom: Oh, haha. Nanako and Katsuya are here?

Nanako: hello naoya

Naonyoom: Hello Nanako-chan!

NPC69: Hm..

Triple Gay: What is it?

NPC69: This is a surprisingly pleasant group, I envy you, Kurusu.

Triple Gay: Akira is fine. Anyways, you're one of us, remember? You're a part of this pleasant group.

Triple Gay: Unless you don't want to be, of course.

NPC69: Hm..

_NPC69 has changed Triple Gay's name to "Pleasant Boy"_

NPC69: There.

Pleasant Boy: Ah, thank you?

NPC69: No problem.

_Yusuke has sent an image_

Yusuke: Futaba why was this sent to me?

MemeSUCC: It's dat boi.

Nanako: oh shit waddup

Chad: Nanako.

Nanako: sorry, i thought it was funny

Yosucce: And you're RIGHT you sweetheart.

Chad: Stop enabling her, Yosuke.

Pleasant Boy: This is usually the other way around.

Chad: I'm not letting Yosuke and Futaba turn Nanako into a memelord.

Nanako: too late

Chad: IWHOEHEKD

Naonyoom: Fuckin rip.

Monya: How old is she, exactly?

Nanako: im 7

MemeSUCC: YO WHAT

MemeSUCC: I'm so sorry, Souji. I didn't know.

Chad: You better be sorry.

Yosucce: Remember when she called you a manwhore?

Quadruple Gay: SHE WASNT WRONG

Chad: Yes. She. Was.

Chad: I only love Yosuke who do you guys think I am.

Pleasant Boy: A good boy.

Shihoe: ^^

Naonyoom: The ultimate chad.

Iwhy: You remind me of a mother.

Minty: Chad.

Tatsuya: Chad.

Katsuya: Ultimate Baller.

Yosucce: Daddy.

Chad: Yosuke.

Yosucce: I'm kiddingn m sorry i couldnt help myself

Chad: I'm not a chad.

Minty: Your name says otherwise.

Chad: G o d

Nanako: big bro

Chad: Yes?

Nanako: whats a chad?

Yusuke: Let's see.. Urban Dictionary says "A stereotypical douchebag asshoke/jock/frat boy/ with an ego the size of the planet, who needs a swift roundhouse kick to the jaw, ala Chuck Norris style (though if actually issued by Norris, this punishment may be too extreme, even for a chad). Basically, they think they're the best at everything, love to talk shit, and are a general nuisance in every way possible."

Nanako: i dont know, kind of sounds like Ren-nii

Quadruple Gay: WOW MEAN

Pleasant Boy: HAHA OH MY GOD

Naonyoom: GET DUNKD ON OHMYGO IWBEKHR

Chad: HH

Jun: Oh dear..

Yosucce: STRAIGHT UP OH MY GOD NANAKO-CHAN

Quadruple Gay: I HATE THIS SO MUCH 

UwUsugi: HHAHHAHA RIPPED INTO AT THIRTY MILES AN HOUR

Nanako: did I say something wrong?

Pleasant Boy: No, of course not, you said everything right.

Nanako: thats good! ill go do the dishes!

Chad: No sweetie

Chad: Sweetie let me

Chad: LET M

Naonyoom: God damn, Ren. She got you good.

Quadruple Gay: Gh.. I know.

Pleasant Boy: How is it being a chad, Riri?

Quadruple Gay: Shut up, Aki.

NPC69: This is great.

Yusuke: What a.. Colourful group.

Jun: Mhm, that's what I like about it though, it's quite nice, don't you think.

Yusuke: Of course. Akira seems to get himself into the strangest groups, he's amazing.

Jun: Hmm..

Yusuke: Hm?

Jun: Nothing, nothing. Don't worry about it.

Yusuke: Well, alright..

Yusuke: May I ask something?

Quadruple Gay: Go ahead.

Yusuke: Amamiya-kun, do you perhaps have a Persona?

Quadruple Gay: Oh.. Well, of course. Not one of my own, though, haha. Me and Akira each have the same Persona's.

Annihalator: How does that work?

Pleasant Boy: Basically, we cant summon one Persona at the same time, except for Arsene.

Quadruple: Except, when we do it in sync, we can summon Satanael.

Annihalator: That's.. Sort of amazing.

Yusuke: I wouldnt expect less from Akira, after all.

Naonyoom: Woah, is Akira the new chad?

Quadruple Gay: YES

Pleasant Boy: NO NO NO

Minty: GOTTEM

Death: How come I'm not the chad?

Minty: You WANT to be the chad?

Death: Kinda.

Chad: Please.. Please take the title away from us.

Death: Okay!

Nanako: what about uesugi? is he a chad?

Jun: Pfffft.

UwUsugi: HAHAHA THATS QUITE ENOUGH

Naonyoom: No no, I think she has a point.

UwUsugi: Stop! Stop!

Pleasant Boy: She's completely right, though. 

_UwUsugi has left the chat_

_Naonyoom has added UwUsugi_

Naonyoom: Don't deny the truth, it's not healthy.

UwUsugi: I cant believe my own boyfriend is doing this to me.

Naonyoom: I still love you, chad or not.

UwUsugi: I'm not a chad!

Minty: You kind of are.

Jun: Hahaha, that is true.

UwUsugi: Nghhh

Chad: This is quite..

Chad: This is the only topic we have stayed on for.. Quite a while?

Pleasant Boy: Oh, you're right. 

Monya: Hey..

Pleasant Boy: Don't you dare..

Monya: It's getting kind of late..

Pleasant Boy: Morgana..

Monya: You must be tired after today.

Pleasant Boy: MORGANA.

Monya: Let's go to sleep.

Pleasant Boy: Ngh.. Fine.

Annihalator: Whipped.

Pleasant Boy: Be quiet, Ann.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to write Iwai more but I never get any chances to make it work.  
> I cried a bit while writing this, to be honest. I don't know why.  
> It's messy and all over the place, but I hope you enjoyed it either way!   
> It was getting too long haha, so I stopped for the day.


	14. Nanako roasts her brother and his boyfriend(Again)

Nanako: big bro whats a penis?

Chad: Hte dick.

Nanako: ooooohhh

Nanako: so you?

Naonyoom: HAH

Jun: How does she know what "hte dick" is and not what a penis is?

Chad: Wow rude.

Tatsuya: It's my fault, I'll take the beating.

Jun: No, no it isn't.

Yusuke: "Hte dick"?

Pleasant Boy: Penis/Souji.

Yusuke: Ah.

Yosucce: It's Chie's fault js js

Jun: I knew it.

Jun: Nanako, sweetie, hit her for me the next time you see her?

Nanako: ok!

Chad: I'll let you use special brass knuckles, too.

Nanako: like knuckles from sonic?

NPC69: omg

Chad: No, I meant actual brass knuckles, but I guess I can buy Knuckles too.

Nanako: ye boi

Yosucce: Jesus christ Souji

Yosucce: Make sure they aren't too heavy

Minty: Teach her 

Death: How to use them properly.

Iwhy: Isn't she seven?

Pleasant Boy: Bloodlust runs in the family, I'm not too worried.

Annihalator: I KIND OF AM AFTER READING THAT

Chad: What's there to worry about?

Iwhy: You're teaching a child how to use brass knuckles.

Pleasant Boy: Maybe we should ask Makoto which one fits her the most..

Nanako: i like the one with the spikes

Annihalator: PWBDKEHBE

Chad: We're joking don't worry.

NPC69: That was.. A violent joke.

Nanako: i do kind of like the one with the spikes tho

Yosucce: That's cute.

Annihalator: NO IT ISNT

Chad: You're cute.

Yosucce: HnMmm

Nanako: im 7 please dont

Naonyoom: Cant believe Souji tried to go down on Yosuke in front of his sister, smh

Chad: NO

Chad: STOP

Shihoe: Yosuke-senpai is kind of cute tbh

Yosucce: nani

Shihoe: Yosuke-senpai

Shihoe: Is 

Shihoe: Kind of cute

Shihoe: Not as cute as Ann, but cute

Chad: Told you so.

Yosucce: Hng thank you you're cute too

Shihoe: ^v^

Tatsuya: I have a feeling Akira is doing something strange.

_Pleasant Boy has sent an image_

Tatsuya: Ah, yes.

Pleasant Boy: He's really cute when he's focused, I couldn't help myself.

NPC69: HOW

Pleasant Boy: ?? I'm just putting cards on his head, it's not that hard.

NPC69: NO not that

Jun: I dont see anything particularly off about this image..?

NPC69: HOW IS KURUSU DOING THE :3 FACE

Pleasant Boy: I thought everyone else could too??

Shihoe: I cant.

Monya: My face is stuck as :3.

Nanako: is that the kitty?

Monya: I'm not a cat!

Pleasant Boy: He's convinced he's human.

Nanako: oh! then hes human!

Monya: ..I'm replacing Akira with her.

NPC69: This doesn't answer my question?

Pleasant Boy: My smile has evolved into the ultimate >:3 after many years of hard training.

Yosucce: Had to fight actual trees, I know, I was there.

Chad: What did I say about encouraging him?

Yosucce: Don't do it?

Chad: Yes, so stop.

Naonyoom: Where is Ren, btw?

Pleasant Boy: I think he's with Ryuji? He's probably ready to pounce right about now, press F to pay respects.

Jun: F

Naonyoom: F

Yusuke: F

Tatsuya: F

Nanako: F

Annihalator: F

Iwhy: F

Takememe: F

UwUsugi: F

Yosucce: F

Chad: F

Death: F

Minty: F

Quadruple Gay: F

Tatsuya: Who can say where the road goes..

Jun: Tatsuya.

Tatsuya: I'll stop.

Pleasant Boy: Go get 'em big bro.

* * *

 

Quadruple Gay: I have his number you big bitches

Nanako: social security number or phone number?

Quadruple Gay: Haha, yes.

Chad: Well done.

Pleasant Boy: Ryuji seems giddy what did you do to him?

Quadruple Gay: Nothing???

Annihalator: Tell us the truth.

Quadruple Gay: Seriously? I didn't do anything!

Pleasant Boy: Hmm..

Pleasant Boy: HMMMMM..

Jun: Hush we have to leave this here

Pleasant Boy: Why?

Jun: The.. The beast..

Pleasant Boy: Oh no..

Monya: You must be tried after today, lets go to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was kind of sad and overwhelmed so I wrote this haha, I hope my distress doesn't show too much. This is really messy and all over the place, but I'm satisfied, I think.


	15. You have activated my trap card, "Protect My Brother At All Costs"! Pt.1

_Chad has changed his name to "Souji"_

Souji: :(

Jun: What is it, Souji?

Souji: They didn't let me hold hands with Yosuke in class.

Yosucce: I'll hold your hand now.

Souji: Okay!

Nanako: Hold mine too!

Yosucce: I will!

Quadruple Gay: I want Ryuji to hold my hand..

Pleasant Boy: Say that to his face you pussy.

Quadruple Gay: You first.

Pleasant Boy: Okay.

_Pleasant Boy has added Ryujee_

Ryujee: whats this?

Pleasant Boy: Ren wants to hold your hand.

Ryujee: ?? me too the fuck????

Quadruple Gay: Th

Monya: Beating your meat to your best friends twin is gay.

Ryujee: so is fingering yiurself to a girl

Monya: I'm a BOY

Ryujee: since when?

Nanako: i dont understand?

Souji: One more innuendo in front of Nanako and I'm crushing both of your hands.

Monya: Yes sir.

Ryujee: oh shit sorry

Souji:  _You're on thin fucking ice._

Quadruple Gay: Wow haha isn't this a great time to make out?

Ryujee: whJAJEPRJNRKE

Quadruple Gay: I couldn't save him..

Monya: WH

Jun: Oh dear.. It seems he has departed.

Yusuke: RIP Ryuji.

Tatsuya: I wonder who the Phantom Thieves are.

Ryujee: NOT US.

Tatsuya: There he is.

Quadruple Gay: Wh.. Thank y.. Tatsooya.. I owe my noodle to you..

Tatsuya: I don't want your dick.

Quadruple Gay: KWJDJEJHRKE

Pleasant Boy: Wow Riri, sleeping with men who are in a relationship now? This is low, even for you.

Naonyoom: I cant believe Tatsuya just single-handedly slayed Ren Mamma Mia The Third in one blow.

Tatsuya: I dont want to suck his non-existent dick either.

Ryujee: wait idk who any of you are

Annihalator: Persona users you big nut

Ryujee: why was ann added before me wtf akira

Pleasant Boy: Because she asked and you didn't.

Ryujee: ok rude

Naonyoom: I still remember the simple days.. When it was just us.. The protagonists.. The beautiful ones.. The stunning protags..

Minty: What about Minako?

Death: I'm sorry, Mi-chan, I know everything about you and all, but who is that?

Minty: I don't know.. Some

Death: Divine force made you write that?

Minty: Yeah.

Nanako: ryoji is a stalker?

Death: Of course not! 

Pleasant Boy: I mean..

Jun: I'm sorry, you kind of are..

Yusuke: I just saw one the most beautiful thing that can be witnessed by a human.

Annihalator: if this is another picture of Akira..

_Yusuke has sent an image_

Annihalator: Akira.. And a dog.

Shihoe: Aw!

_Yusuke has sent an image_

That Bitch: I assumed he only knew how to make a neutral face expression and ">:3". It seems I have been proven wrong.

Ryujee: mayB i can make ren blush like that

Quadruple Gay: No.

Jun: ...

Tatsuya: Jun..

Lisa⭐Lisa: Wow rude stop flirting, i want a big tiddy goth girlfriend to stop my hurt :^(

* * *

**_Sakamoto Ryuji > Kurusu Akira_ **

_RS: how do i do it?_

_AK: Ask about Pokemon Go, he'll start ranting and then he'll get embarrassed about it._

_RS: thanks dude._

_AK: You're welcome._

_AK: May I ask, how come you got so close to him in such a short time?_

_RS: i guess we just hit it off really well?_

_RS: its kind of like what happened with you an yusuke_

_RS: you two fell in love while we were still going through madarames palace lmao_

_AK: How do you know..?_

_RS: im not that stupid, y'know? youre not very good at hiding that sort of thing either_

_AK: That must have been awful to watch.._

_RS: it was frustrating and all, but not awful_

_RS: you spent a lotta time just staring at him tho_

_AK: Fair enough._

_RS: hell yeah_

_RS: go gettem 'kira_

_AK: You too, good luck with Ren. I'm glad it was you who caught his eye._

_RS: wow, more than one sentence from akira? who are you?_

_AK: The one who will murder you if you hurt big brother._

_RS: Kwoeheoke ok i get it!_

* * *

 

Naonyoom: I think you two should chill?

Quadruple Gay: Listen, ONE wrong move, and you're dead Yusuke.

Yusuke: What makes you think I'd dare try to hurt Akira?

Quadruple Gay: You could be lying.

Yusuke: But I'm not. It is absolutely preposterous that you would doubt me when I say that he means everything to me.

Pleasant Boy: Ren.

Naonyoom: Oh thank god..

Quadruple Gay: That's what everyone says. I'll protect him no matter what.

Pleasant Boy:  _Ren you motherfucker._

Naonyoom: You two please stop..

Ryujee: akira threatened me sort of like this just now

Tatsuya: He protecc but he also attacc

Jun: The Kurusu/Amamiya's in their natural habitat. They are normally harmless, quiet creatures. But if they feel threatened or if they feel their brothers are at risk, they immediately attack viciously.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part one of what I want to expand upon when my brain isn't half dead, haha. I hope you guys are okay with a half-update, sorry for the inconvenience.  
> By the way, thank you guys for the overwhelming amount of support last time! I feel much better now!


	16. Hey guys im mmmmmmmmmm

* * *

 

Quadruple Gay: One(1) more rumour about 'Kira and I'm grrr

UwUsugi: and I'm grrr

Tatsuya: and I'm grrr

Death: Lolmaoexdeemaonade xd haha ifunny.co

Jun: ifunny.co

Yusuke: ifunny.co

Ryujee: ifunny.co

Pleasant Boy: ifunny.co

NPC69: ifunny.co

Iwhy: ifunny.co

Takememe: ifunny.co

Tatsuya: ifunny.co

Naonyoom: ifunny.co

Minty: ifunny.co

Yosucce: ifunny.co

UwUsugi: ifunny.co

Monya: ifunny.co

MemeSUCC: ifunny.co

Annihalator: ifunny.co

Shihoe: ifunny.co

Quadruple Gay: ifunny.co

Ryujee: yo akira

Ryujee: akira

Pleasant Boy: Yeah?

Ryujee: youre more of a cat than morgana is

Pleasant Boy: T

Pleasant Boy: Take that back.

Monya: No no, explain?

_Ryujee has sent a video_

Monya: HAHAHAH

Monya: GOD 

Ryujee: renren gave this to me just so you kno

Pleasant Boy: First of all, Renren? Second of all, I'm going to strangle him the next time I see him.

MemeSUCC: im SENDING THIS TO EVERYONE

Pleasant Boy: NO

Annihalator: JWORBRKJFJF

Jun: I love my cat son.

Yusuke: Mrrrp.

Pleasant Boy: Yusuke..

Yusuke: I'm sorry, it's rather cute though

Iwhy: I cant believe my ears.

Takememe: Ah, I've heard this a couple of times when he woke up.

Monya: I'M ALWAYS THERE TO SEE HIM WAKE UP HOW COME I HAVENT HEARD IT?

Pleasanr Boy: H

Pleasant Boy: Hey guys want to see something else?

Naonyoom: WAIT I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO SEND STIPSTPSITOIROSOROTOSOOROTP

_Pleasant Boy has send a video_

Chad: OH GOD DAMN HAH

Takememe: I cant open it, what is it?

Tatsuya: An three hour-long video of every time Naoya said any variation of Hidehiko Useugi's name.

Naonyoom: WHY

Death: I've only heard the other protagonists talk for up to six minutes, and yet there's a three hour video of Naoya Toudou himself saying only Hidehi-chan.

_Pleasant Boy has send a video_

Takememe: Length 5:56:32

Minty: :)

Jun: I didn't know you could speak that much?

Minty: I wasn't planning on letting and of you know.

NPC69: Why do you keep these on your phone?

Pleasant Boy: Blackmail.

UwUsugi: Kyaa Naoya loves me enough to speak for me

Naonyoom: Y

Naonyoom: Yes of course I do but I Do Not Speak.

_Nanako has sent a video_

Chad: NANAKO

Pleasant Boy: ITS LONGER THAN MINE

Annihalator: That's what she said.

Pleasant Boy: ANN

MemeSUCC: ;) ;) ;) ;)

_MemeSUCC has sent a video_

Naonyoom: AN ENTIRE SIX HOURS DUDE

Yusuke: Akira.. Hearing your voice is always pleasant, to think you'd say my name in such a loving tone.

Pleasant Boy: Iiii iii iii i hh

Ryujee: cant believe you killed my best friend smh

Lisa⭐Lisa: !!! I have one

_Lisa⭐Lisa has sent a video_

Tatsuya: Ah..

Jun: Ah.

NPC69: I just hear "Tatsuya..! Jun. Jun. Jun.. Tatsuya. Jun.. Jun... Tatsuya! Tatsu-"

Shihoe: Such fond voices haha

Yusuke: It's easy to tell just by this video that they are infatuated.

Tatsuya: I know I am.

Jun: Tatsuya..

Pleasant Boy: :>

Monya: Get a room?? 

Ryujee: ill do my best to have renren say my name for eight hours, just you guys wait

Yusuke: Hm.. That has quite the immoral ring to it.

Ryujee: WH NOT LIJE THAT 

Quadruple Gay: Aww, really? :^( I got my hopes up for nothing.

Pleasant Boy: Go get 'em big bro.

Nanako: use protection

Chad: NANAKO

Iwhy: I don't understand why these are such a big deal, and I don't think I want to know, either.

Lisa⭐Lisa: Let me explain!

Monya: That is Boss' line bitc

Lisa⭐Lisa: The Pretty Protagonist squad, consisting of Naoya Toudou, Tatsuya Suou, Minato Arisato, Souji Seta, and Akira Kurusu, is quite the silent group. As they do not speak much, ever. That is because they are emo fu

Jun: Okay that's enough haha! 

Lisa⭐Lisa: :^)

Tatsuya: I wasn't aware that I was an emo..?

Minty: Souji definitely isn't an emo, big chad.

Annihalator: Big ;) ;)

Ryujee: ANN WHAT THE FUCK

Pleasant Boy: NO CUSSING IN FRONT OF THE CHILDREN

Nanako: fuck

Pleasant Boy: You're Dead Sakamoto.

Ryujee: OH SHIT

Quadruple Gay: This is quite the predicament because I love both my brother and my boyfriend, and I don't want to yell at either of them :(

Jun: It's okay, they're just joking. I think.

Quadruple Gay: I sure hope so.

_Minty has added Kiriimom_

Kiriimom: @Kurusu_Akira Don't kill him too hard.

Pleasant Boy: Okay!

Minty: I added you to be damage control but you're just an enabler.

Kiriimom: ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry that this is a little later than usual haha, I'm fine to update tomorrow again though! So look forward to that? Maybe.  
> I really want to write a Tatsuya-centric chapter but iiiii my heart cant handle too much of the good boy  
> Mitsuru is here! :D


	17. Pants Discourse, Starring Tatsuya Suou and his ugly pants hating side-kick, Eriko Kirishima. 4/20's Eve.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> H,, hey guys guess what today is where I live?
> 
> 4/20 
> 
> It's my dogs birthday haha I love him :D  
> My wife, him, my other dog and I are celebrating with dog treats..   
> Lov yuo weed pupper :'^)

Tatsuya: I really hate Kaiba's ugly boot pants.

Jun: ..Boot pants?

Tatsuya: Yeah, pants and boots, but.. The boots are the pants.

Jun: No offense but that sounds disgusting.

Annihalator: I feel violated on three different levels.

Pleasant Boy: God I loved Yugioh..

Ryujee: is that where you got your dumb poses from

Pleasant Boy: That and Jojo.

Quadruple Gay: Boot pants..

Tatsuya: I'm sorry you had to witness this, Ren.

Quadruple Gay: I'm gonna bet Akira will decide to wear a pair of those just to spite you.

Minty: He wont, but I will.

Naonyoom: Oh wait let me invite Eriko.

_Naonyoom has added Ericult_

Ericult:  _What is this about Kaiba's pants?_

Tatsuya: They're hideous.

Yusuke: Why are you all talking about Yugioh?

NPC69: It's time to d-d-d-d-d-duel..

Ericult: Ugh, have you seen Kaito Momota's stupid folded pants? I want to burn them.

UwUsugi: time to fold my pants

Ericult:  _Don't._

Ericult: You already have enough ugly pairs of pants.

Tatsuya: Excuse me?

_Ericult has sent an image_

UwUsugi: WHY DO YOU HAVE A PICTURE OF MY PANTS

Ericult: I asked Naoya

UwUsugi: NAOYA

Naonyoom: To be fair, she payed me. I had no choice.

UwUsugi: YOU DID YOU JUST HHGGGHHHH

Naonyoom: Is this a good time for my to mention that I love you?

UwUsugi: GGHRHH

Naonyoom: :)

UwUsugi: hsjhh

UwUsugi:

Annihalator: So many ugly pants in one picture.. 

Tatsuya: Your pants are tasteless, Uesugi.

Katsuya: I just saw and I'm not.. Ok.. Call the hospital....

Tatsuya: I cant believe that my brother is dead.

UwUsugi: That Is Rude.

Jun: I don't see what the big deal is.

Tatsuya: It's nothing, just.. Kaiba's boot pants are awful to look at. And Uesugi's pants are ridiculous.

Tatsuya: Don't worry, you're always stunning.

Jun: Oh, thank you. You are too!

Tatsuya: 

Tatsuya:

Tatsuya:

_Lisa⭐Lisa has sent an image_

Lisa⭐Lisa: wow do u have to embarrass him whenever i ask to hang out with him?

Jun: Adorable, I love him!

_Lisa⭐Lisa has sent an image_

Lisa⭐Lisa: omg stop hes going to die 

Jun: I'm saving all of these just so you know.

Death: :)

Lisa⭐Lisa: no

Death: :(

Nanako: !!! is this what they call "smitten gay fucks"? 

Chad: NN

Yosucce: oh damn nanako

UwUsugi: who taught you that lmao

Nanako: daddy said thats what big bro and yosuke are! 

Pleasant Boy: HA

NPC69: You have activated my trap card.

Chad: Nanakoooo

Chad: blease stop listenibg to uncle

Nanako: ok!

Tatsuya: hhh

Jun: ♥

Tatsuya: ♥❤♥❤⭐❤⭐⭐♥❤❤♥❤⭐♥⭐⭐❤♥⭐♥⭐♥♥♥⭐⭐♥❤⭐♥

NPC69: You have activated my trap card.

Minty: Oh my go

Death: Don't say that bitches name in front of me.

Shihoe: Ugly.. Pant.. Discourse..

Pleasant Boy: Is NPC-kun okay?

NPC69: My deck has no pathetic cards Kaiba, but it does have THIS DICK

Jun: He'll be fine.

Yusuke: Rest in Peace, NPC.

Tatsuya: Yume no tobiraaa...

Jun: Okay, all those for loving Tatsuya say "I".

Tatsuya: !!!!

Katsuya: I.

Lisa⭐Lisa: i!!!!!!

Chad: I.

Yosucce: i.

Nanako: i

Takememe: I.

Pleasant Boy: I.

Quadruple Gay: I!

That Bitch: I.

Yusuke: I.

NPC69: You have activated my trap card.

Naonyoom: I

UwUsugi: i

Ericult: I

Kiriimom: I.

Minty: I. 

Death: I!!

Shihoe: I!

Annihalator: I.

Tatsuya: pajekejejhskkdjdn

Jun: \\(´♥`)/ I!

Tatsuya: 

Tatsuya:

Tatsuya:

Tatsuya: ilyat

Pleasant Boy: I'd hate to interrupt this wonderful moment, but it's 20 seconds until 4/20.

Naonyoom: YO

Death: WOKE

Minty: WHY DIDNT YOU TELL US

Pleasant Boy: 15

Jun: I'm not ready! 

Ericult: Oh dear..

Pleasant Boy: 10

Kiriimom: It's so sudden..

Pleasant Boy: 5

Annihalator: Oh FUCK what if I'm not ready?

Shihoe: HHGHhhHhnnnnn

Pleasant Boy: 3

Pleasant Boy: 2

Pleasant Boy: 1

Pleasant Boy: Happy 4/20!

Quadruple Gay: Happy New Year!

Tatsuya: Happy 4/20

Jun: Happy 4/20

Shihoe: Happy 4/20!!

Annihalator: Happy 4/20!

Ericult: Happy 4/20

Kiriimom: Happy 4/20

Naonyoom: Happy 4/20

UwUsugi: Merry Christmas

Takememe: Happy 4/20

Ryujee: Happy 4/20

Tatsuya: Hm.. It's not perfect.

Yusuke: Happy Hanukkah.

Pleasant Boy: Ren.

Quadruple Gay: I'm sorry I panicked :'^(

Naonyoom: Hide..

UwUsugi: :} ho ho ho

Lisa⭐Lisa: fuckin grinch lookin ass

Pleasant Boy: Yusuke?

Yusuke: I was confused, I apologize.

Pleasant Boy: No no, sweetie, that was hilarious ily <3

Monya: Whipped

Pleasant Boy: Something you'll be once I'm done with you.

Annihalator: Kinky.

Pleasant Boy: Wait no.

Tatsuya: Happy birthday weed..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to rewrite this twice because I'm a dumbass and I copy-pasted something else instead of the chapter when I switched tabs. A tragic story.
> 
> Anyways I love Tatsuya.  
> Hidehiko wears ugly pants when he is alone and that's how it is on this bitch of an earth.  
> Everyone still loves him though. Ugly pants and all.


	18. One more Yugioh reference and I'm sending you to the shadow realm.

Pleasant Boy: So I walk into class LATE because Morgana wanted sushi and I'm a good friend.

Annihalator: Oh my godf

Pleasant Boy: And there sits Ren, in MY uniform. In my chair. In my domain. My.. My haven..

NPC69: I,m giggle

Pleasant Boy: "Sorry I'm late" I say as I notice him and realize this motherfucker set me up to turn up late. 

Pleasant Boy: Do you guys know what he said?

Minty: I don't know but I really want to.

Tatsuya: Please tell us.

Pleasant Boy: "*gasp* The pharaoh!"

Quadruple Gay: :)

Yusuke: The pharaoh?

Kiriimom: ..Yugioh?

Quadruple Gay: ;)

Ryujee: Wait wtf what 

Tatsuya: What happened next?

Annihalator: Akira took him outside, idk what they did then though. Amamiya-kun apologized to the class though.

Quadruple Gay: He scolded me :( He's my smol brother, but he hangs out with Mitsuru-senpai too much and she teaches him how to be scary :(

Kiriimom: I would just like to say that it's Nanjo's fault, not mine.

Naonyoom: Don't blame Kei!! 

Naonyoom: He doesn't know that he's frightening.

Pleasant Boy: Thanks for ruining my reputation, Riri.

Quadruple Gay: What, "The Delinquent"? Aki, that was ruined after you were spotted giving soda to that cat of yours outside of the school.

Monya: Not a cat.

Quadruple: Human of yours.

Monya: Good.

Ryujee: Yoooo i saw that online

Tatsuya: "That's bad for cats", apparently.

Monya: First of all!! I am not a cat!!!!

Pleasant Boy: I'll make sure to tell them that.

_Ryujee has sent an image_

Ryujee: Well.. He didnt say you were a cat, thats for sure.

Monya: Hey!!

NPC69: I still don't understand how a cat can talk and type, though.

Tatsuya: He's special.

Monya: I'm not a cat, for gods sake!

Death: Whom the fucks sake?

Minty: Down boy.

Death: Yes daddy.

Quadruple Gay: What?

Annihalator: Wtf is Akira's icon.

Jun: Is that Kitagawa-kun?

Pleasant Boy: And Morgana.

Monya: I hate you.

Pleasant Boy: I love you too.

Yusuke: I cant believe my boyfriend is a furry..

Chad: YO HWMA T

Minty: Dude..

Ryujee: I CANT BELIV EE

Pleasant Boy: I'm not a furry!

Yusuke: Right. That is Ann, I believe.

Annihalator: Hey!

Shihoe: OMG

Shihoe: You didn't tell me :(?

Annihalator: I'm not a furry, that's why I didn't tell you!

Yosucce: I can say from personal experience that it's not good to deny yourself.

Pleasant Boy: Yeah, Ann. You might birth a shadow.

Shihoe: PREGNANT TOO? I NEED TO KNOW THESE THINGS ANN I AM YOUR WIFE.

Annihalator: We're not married!!

Shihoe: Ah.. I forgot to propose.

Annihalator: You forgo

Tatsuya: Excuse m

Yusuke: What an interesting turn of events..

Pleasant Boy: I should probably propose to Yusuke..

Yusuke: Yes.

Pleasant Boy: :D

NPC69: We are TOO YOUNG

Pleasant Boy: Do you want to be the flower girl?

NPC69: BOY  _DO I_

Kiriimom: Can I propose to Yukari?

Katsuya: What's going on?

Death: Minato!!!

Minty: Sure, I'd love to.

Chad: Well.. 

Yosucce: :)

Chad: Wanna?

Yosucce: Do what? :)

Chad: Get married.

Nanako: i do! 

Naonyoom: !!!!

Ryujee: Renren guess what id like to ask

UwUsugi: !!!!!!!!!! Yeeee

Quadruple Gay: !!! Did you buy me Yugioh cards?

Ryujee: will you marry me?

Quadruple Gay: Of course!

Monya: Lady Ann..

Iwhy: Stop.

Chad: Yes, dad.

Minty: K dad.

Naonyoom: Sorry daddy.

Yosucce: sorry dad.

Katsuya: Yes, dad.

Takememe: Right.

Nanako: yes daddy sorry daddy

Pleasant Boy: I apologize on behalf of these hooligans, father.

That Bitch: I am sorry, father. That was very immature of everyone.

NPC69: Yes dad.

Yusuke: Yes, dad.

Tatsuya: Yes dad.

Jun: Of course, sorry father.

MemeSUCC: yeet daddy

UwUsugi: ok dad

Ryujee: im sorry dad

Quadruple Gay: I wont do it again, dad.

Iwhy: ?

Iwhy: Akira, what?

Pleasant Boy: I'm sorry I've never had a real dad before, now I have two and it is overwhelming.

Quadruple Gay: I'm in the same situation and yet I dont act like Akechi 2.0.

That Bitch: Excuse me?

Iwhy: Two dads?

Pleasant Boy: Coffee dad and gun dad. I also have Yoshida but he's more of a really nice uncle.

Quadruple Gay: !!! I wanna meet the coffee dad! 

Annihalator: Yoshida??? The politician?????

Pleasant Boy: No, the sun. Who else?

Kiriimom: Shouldn't you all be getting to sleep?

Takememe: Me too?

Kiriimom: You too. And Iwai-kun.

Iwhy: Don't get cocky.

Kiriimom: I'll kill you.

Iwhy: Alright, I get it.

Monya: ..Teach me your ways, Kiriijo-senpai.

Ryujee: pls no

Quadruple Gay: I'll sleep with you, Ryu.

Pleasant Boy: One more word out of you and you wont be able to sleep.

Tatsuya: Akira that's kinky.

Pleasant Boy: Stop.

NPC69: I dont see why all of you are so against sleeping?

Minty: I'm afraid I'll die again.

Death: Minato..

Chad: Mina..

Shihoe: Arisato-san, it'll be ok! We'll make sure you don't!

Minty: I appreciate it, thank you Shiho.

Shihoe: You're welcome!

Yosucce: Shiho saves the day yet again.

Annihalator: I love her so much..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The image at the start is Akira's twitter(?) replying to the post saying "His name is Morgana, just so you know."
> 
> I'd imagine his Twitter being only pictures of Morgana, Yusuke, and the others. Along with some really short videos where he puts Furbies in unexpected places.
> 
> Tatsuya's would be pictures of Jun and the others. Mostly Jun. Sometimes the others comment on them saying "Cute, you should marry him" over and over.
> 
> Naoya's is him making fun of Minato, Souji, and Akira's spinoff games. He posts Big Time Rush lyrics.
> 
> Minato's is him making very vague jabs at Souji. Sometimes he posts pictures of his friends because he loves them, but he doesn't want anyone to know.
> 
> Souji's(and Nanako's) account is them posting about going to Junes, Souji posting about how much he loves Yosuke and cats. There is a very cursed post mixed in, it is said that if you find it, you die.  
> It's just Nanako doing the "okay" hand symbol.  
> Sometimes Souji replies to Minato's jabs but everyone else scolds him for making fun of Minato.


	19. I never looked anywhere else because I was too busy looking at you.

Yusuke: The  _sensation._

Naonyoom: ????

Quadruple Gay: Interesting.

Jun: Excuse me?

Ryujee: Ryuji, please get off my phone. 

Yusuke: Whomst is Ryuji? I only know Sayuri.

Quadruple Gay: gasp

Monya: Can we replace Ryuji with the Sayuri?

Yusuke: you effing cat

Monya: Call me a cat one more time and I'm telling Boss.

Yusuke: plx no

Monya: Boss.. They're bullying me...

Yusuke: whaht

_Pleasant Boy has sent an image._

Pleasant Boy: He's showing the phone.

Naonyoom: Hi Coffee Daddy!

Pleasant Boy:  ** _Naoya you are on thin ice._**

Tatsuya: Hmm..

Tatsuya: Interesting.

Ryujee: its not my fault that youre a cat!

Monya: See this? Bullying!

Nanako: id love to be a cat! mayB daddy would love me more.

Chad: Are you okay?

Nanako: no

Monya: I'm inviting Boss :(

_Monya has added Sakura Sojiro_

MemeSUCC: Hi dad

Pleasant Boy: Hello, dad.

Naonyoom: hi coffee daddy

UwUsugi: hewwo coffee dad

Iwhy: Hello dad.

Takememe: Hi dad.

Quadruple Gay: Hewwo, father.

Tatsuya: Hi dad.

Yusuke: Hello, dad.

Jun: Good evening, father.

Yosucce: hi dad

Chad: Hello, Sakura-san.

Nanako: hi new dad!

Kiriimom: Hello, father.

Annihalator: Hi boss

Shihoe: hello Sakura-san!

Sojiro Sakura: Who are you people?

Annihalator: I'm Ann, Shihoe is my girlfriend Shiho. Yusuke is Yusuke. MemeSUCC is Futaba, and Pleasant Boy is Akira.

Takememe: I'm Takemi Tae, and Iwhy is Iwai.

Quadruple Gay: I'm Ren!

Ryujee: im ryuji 

Jun: Me and Tatsuya are Akira and Ren's new legal parents!

Sojiro Sakura: Yeah, I know you two.

Naonyoom: I'm the first protagonist, Naoya Toudou.

Tatsuya: Who's Naoya Toudou?

Naonyoom: >:(

Pleasant Boy: You don't know the rest, probably.

Monya: What about me!?

Sojiro Sakura: The cat?

Monya: Not a cat!

That Bitch: Feline.

Sojiro Sakura: Who is "That Bitch"?

Yusuke: Akechi Goro.

That Bitch: Good evening, Sakura-san.

Sojiro Sakura: And, why am I here?

Monya: Make them stop calling me a cat!

Sojiro Sakura: Stop calling the cat a cat.

Sojiro Sakura: I'm leaving.

_Sojiro Sakura has left_

_Naonyoom has added Sojiro Sakura_

Naonyoom: You're one of us now, Coffee Dad.

Tatsuya: One of us one of us.

Jun: One of us, one of us!

Kiriimom: One of us, one of us, one of us.

Pleasant Boy: I'm so sorry, Sojiro. I fought until the very end..

Sojiro Sakura: No you didn't.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ;)  
> I'm sorry I'm updating later than usual, I'm in the hospital again. I'll be okay though!  
> Sojiro is here, but I don't know how to write him, or anyone for that matter haha. It's a shorter chapter too :( But I can try write another tomorrow!


	20. Minako is just really happy to be here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I posted too early so whoever read it at that time rip  
> And then I forgot to change the date  
> I'm extremely smart as you can see.

Iwhy: Minato.

Minty: Iwai-san?

Iwhy: Are you related to a regular of mine called Minako Arisato?

Minty: Whom?

Kiriimom: You don't even know your own twin sister?

Yosucce: Does every protagonist have a brother or sister?

Chad: I only have Nanako.

Nanako: !!! :D I can keep you all to myself then!

Yosucce: What about me?

Nanako:  ~~ ** _You can have his dick, Junes boy._**~~ I'll share!

Minty: Since when do I have a twin?

Death: What are you talking about? You were talking to Minako-chan yesterday.

Minty: No I

Death: You weren't? I have

Minty: Video evidence? Send the video, then.

_Death has sent a video_

Minty: What the hell? 

Minty: I don't remember having a sister.

Pleasant Boy: She was always so nice to me, how is she doing?

Minty: I wouldn't know because I don't know who she is.

Shihoe: Does anyone have her as a friend?

Death: I do!

Shihoe: Add her!

_Death has added Minakowo_

UwUsugi: Wonderful taste in profile name, Minako-chan.

Minakowo: I can say the same to you, Uesugi-chan.

Naonyoom: Tatsuya she's stealing my boyfriend..

Tatsuya: Don't be a cuck, Naoya.

Minty: Who are you!?

Minakowo: Wow that is Rude. I'm your sister??? Who else??

Minty: I don't have a sister!

Minakowo: lol ok.

Shihoe: Hello Minako-san! I'm Shiho Suzui, it's nice to meet you! Minato-san always spoke so highly of you!

Minty: No I didn't.

Minakowo: Nice to meet you Shiho-chan! I love you already! 

Annihalator: Hey.

Minakowo: !!! Sisterly love I'm sorry Ann-chan!

Annihalator: It's okay, omg ily already too you're so sweet.

Pleasant Boy: Are you sick, Mina? 

Minty: Ughhh whatever.

Takememe: I can look at you, if you'd like.

Minty: No, but thanks.

Katsuya: Hm.. Every protag has a sibling except for Souji, huh..

Tatsuya: "Except for Souji" sounds familiar.. Must just be my imagination.

Pleasant Boy: You must be hallucinating.

Pleasant Boy: Anyways.. I should go, I'm taking Yusuke out to eat. Bye!

Minakowo: Ohohoho?

NPC69: Oh? 

NPC69: I'm sending that to the class groupchat.

Annihalator: There's a class groupchat?

Pleasant Boy: There's a what?

NPC69: Yeah lol, people didnt want to add you two 'cause of the rumours and stuff.

Annihalator: That's rude???? Add me????

Shihoe: Add me and Akira too!!!!!

Pleasant Boy: I'd rather have minimal contact with our classmates, no thanks.

NPC69: I'm adding you anyway.

Minty: Add me instead.

Kiriimom: You don't go to their school, Minato.

Minty: I want to embarrass Akira.

Minakowo: Me too!!!

_NPC69 has sent an image_

NPC69: Say goodbye to your delinquent reputation.

Jun: "I cant believe the delinquent has a cuter love life than I do", that's sort of sad. But Aki deserves the love.

Yusuke: It seems more like Akira is the one giving me more love than I deserve sometimes.

Yusuke: Ah, not just sometimes. All the time.

Nanako: !!!! No!!! You deserve all the love

Yosucce: Dude..

Minakowo: Ily!!!

Pleasant Boy: Don't you dare! I love you with all of my heart, Yu. I will never be able to show you exactly how much I love you, but I can try! I will try my absolute best to make you feel as loved as possible.

Jun: I'm pretty sure everyone here is attached to Kitagawa by now. Or.. Excuse me, I guess I can welcome him into the Kurosu-Kurusu-Suou family?

Pleasant Boy: !!! 

Yusuke: That would be wonderful, thank you. I love you, Akira.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not writing the class groupchat haha.
> 
> Minako is here and I love her lots! Her fandom is kind of scary but !!! She's really good.
> 
> Anyways, I want to ship Minako with someone, but I dunno who. I was thinking Akihiko or Aegis, but I don't know, whatever you guys prefer! 
> 
> I was listening to "Rock Over Japan" by Triple H while writing and it helped me feel good enough to write! So um! Check that out? Mawaru Penguindrum is really good I'm very happy today because of it. I love the singer, I think she voiced Sonia Nevermind from DanganRonpa 2? 
> 
> I'm still sick but my brother visits every day so I'm okay! He was the one who introduced me to the song haha, I found MP because of it :^>!
> 
> I probably seem really loopy haha. Lots of I love you's because I love everyone!


	21. Sike I said I wouldnt write this but I already did

_NPC69 has added Akira, Ann, and Shiho to "Clap on 'em"_

_Ann has changed her name to "McLady Ann"_

_Ann has changed Akira's name to "Fear of Firecrackers"_

_Shiho has changed her name to "Shiba-inu"_

Fear of Firecrackers: What's this?

Kyouko: The class groupchat.

_Fear of Firecrackers has left_

_Shiba-inu has added Fear of Firecrackers_

Yeet: why do you not want to join? :(

Fear of Firecrackers: I do not like the way most of you treat my friends.

TearMeToPieces: what about how we treat u

Fear of Firecrackers: I guess that too.

Skinny Penis: Shiho-san is here?

Shiba-inu: :^)

Skinny Penis: Hello, how have you been? 

Shiba-inu: I'm better! Ann was here to support me so, better.

Ai from the school newspaper: Give me the deets on your relationships.

Ai from the school newspaper: Especially you, delinquent-san.

Fear of Firecrackers: No.

NPC69: I'll tell them.

Fear of Firecrackers: Absolutely not. I'd rather nothing happen to him.

Skinny Penis: Him? 

NPC69: They're really sweet lol, Ann-san, tell us how it is being in the same room as them.

McLady Ann: Akira almost cried yesterday because he was "so cute".

Shiba-inu: Akira sneaks money into Kitagawa-kun's pockets.

Fear of Firecrackers: I'm leaving.

Ai from the school newspaper: Wait no, I need your opinion.

Ai from the school newspaper: How much do you love him?

Fear of Firecrackers: A whole lot, I'd do anything for him.

Kyouko: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

_NPC69 has sent an image_

Chi*clap*yo: omg lol 

Skinny Penis: Is the cat making a disgusted face? Is that an actual thing your cat can do?

Shiba-inu: Morgana is convinced he's human.

Hottieru: Is that Akechi-kun?

Fear of Firecrackers: Yeah, he's a regular.

Kyouko: Listen, I know the vocal point was supposed to be Akira and his boy. But.. Is that the Sayuri?

Skinny Penis: There're so many things off about this picture.

Skinny Penis: Is that Okumura-san?

Hottieru: The.. The detective prince is a regular in the place The Delinquent works.

McLady Ann: Akira lives there.

Kyouko: What th

Moon Moon: Oh, Aki you're here.

Fear of Firecrackers: I wont be for long.

_Fear of Firecrackers is now incapable of leaving_

Fear of Firecrackers: :( 

Ai from the school newspaper: Aki?

Shiba-inu: Oh! Wait.

_Shiba-inu has added Ren_

Ren: Time to bring out the baby pictures.

Fear of Firecrackers:  ** _Ban him._**

Kyouko: Who's this?

Ren: The guy that pretended to be Akiaki, do you guys want embarrassing pictures of my brother or not?

Ai from the school newspaper: Interesting, DM me.

Ai from the school newspaper: ..

Ai from the school newspaper: Kurusu isn't a delinquent lol.

Fear of Firecrackers: What did he 

_Ai from the school newspaper has sent an image_

Shiba-inu: I just heard Akira screech let me open the file.

McLady Ann: HE'S TINY HAH

Ren: That's Kanji and everyone loves him.

Kyouko: He... He >:3

Kyouko: That's my new icon.

Skinny Penis: Mine too lmao

Hottieru: Who's the big daddy, is he single?

Ren: No, belongs to Naoto.

Hottieru: Forbidden snack...

NPC69: I cant believe Akira was a dance major

Fear of Firecrackers: I was  _not._

Ren: I live for embarrassing my brother, who wants another?

Ai from the school newspaper: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Kyouko: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

_Ren has sent a video_

Skinny Penis: Takamaki wasn't joking

Hottieru: OKAY who's THIS snack right here.

Ren: Tatsuya and he's belongs to Jun.

Hottieru: Forbidden snack.. What about the other one?

Fear of Firecrackers: Dating Death.

Hottieru: What?

Shiba-inu: Ryoji-kun is Death.

Kyouko: ???? Ok.

Ren: Speaking of Minato, he wanted to be added.

Fear of Firecrackers: Can I leave?

_Fear of Firecrackers is incapable of leaving_

Fear of Firecrackers: :(

Skinny Penis: Why do you want to leave so badly? Accept your fate.

Fear of Firecrackers: One, your treatment of Ryuji, Ann and the others.

Fear of Firecrackers: Two, your treatment of me.

Fear of Firecrackers: I've already witnessed your true forms.

McLady Ann: You went into Mementos without us?

Fear of Firecrackers: No, that's not what I meant.

Kyouko: I understand. We'll make it up to you all.

Hottieru: Ya!

Ren: This'll be funny.

* * *

 

Skinny Penis: sapnu puas

Shiba-inu: Only to Ann.

McLady Ann: ;)

Hottieru: So, you two are dating?

McLady Ann: Yes.

Ai from the school newspaper: Details?

Shiba-inu: She confessed first! I was ecstatic!

Shiba-inu: She cried too.

McLady Ann: Did not!

Shiba-inu: Did too.

TearMeToPieces: Great, all of the cute girls are taken.

Hottieru: Bitch.

TearMeToPieces: Not that you're not cute.

Hottieru: You cant take it back now, ho. 

TearMeToPieces: Asahi help

Skinny Penis: You did this to yourself.

Kyouko: I think you're cute, Hotaru!

Hottieru: Aww, you're really pretty too, Kyouko!

Kyouko: Don't let these awful boys get to you :(.

Hottieru: I wont! They aren't that attractive anyways.

NPC69: That's true.

Ren: ???? But??? All of you are pretty?? From what I've seen anyway.

McLady Ann: Are you trying to get ass?

Ren: I'm literally in love with Ryuji.

Ai from the school newspaper: I'm about to have a seizure.

Hottieru: How come all of the delinquents have cuter love lifes than me!?

Shiba-inu: Hey.

Hottieru: Oh, right. Not delinquents.

Kyouko: I'll give you a cute love life, Hotaru.

Hottieru: Omg Kyouko really? You'll help find someone for me? Thank you you're a real friend!

Kyouko: That's not..

Hottieru: Oh, mom's calling. I'll speak to all of you later! Thank you, love you Kyou!

_Hottieru is offline_

Kyouko: Sigh..

NPC69: Kyouko..

Kyouko: It's okay, I'm glad she's happy.

Fear of Firecrackers: Why don't you tell her?

Kyouko: Ugh are you crazy? There's no way. Every time she sees a cute boy she's all over them in a second.

Fear of Firecrackers: It wouldn't hurt to try, would it?

Kyouko: What?

Shiba-inu: He's right! I thought Ann was into boys until she confessed! 

McLady Ann: I think I've seen her staring at you a lot in class?

Moon Moon: If she stops talking to you because of it, the Phantom Thieves will give her a change of heart. Isn't that right?

Fear of Firecrackers: I'm down.

McLady Ann: Me too!

Shiba-inu: Me three.

Ren: I don't mind.

Kyouko: Right.. Right. I'll do it.

Fear of Firecrackers: Good luck.

Skinny Penis: Is everyone seriously gay?

Ai from the school newspaper: You're not?

Skinny Penis: No??? Why would I be.

Ai from the school newspaper: lol

Shiba-inu: lol

NPC69: lol

McLady Ann: lol

Fear of Firecrackers: Lol.

Ren: lol

Moon Moon: lol

TearMeIntoPieces: lol

Fumihiro: Lol

TearMeIntoPieces: CRYPTID SPOTTED

Ai from the school newspaper: Screenshotted.

Fumihiro: Blocked and reported.

Ai from the school newspaper: Oof

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Fear of Firecrackers" is a reference to my best friends cats terror when she sees firecrackers. Nya nya, Akira-kun.
> 
> I had a lot of fun writing this, but it wont be a thing, probably. It's mostly just a filler chapter to say sorry for not posting as much haha.
> 
> I'll be back on track next week!


	22. Pleas send he lp

_"Protagonist Council", 10 Members._

Toudou Naoya: May I call for a PC meeting?

Seta Souji: Eat ass.

Toudou Naoya: I already did that today, tomorrow.

Toudou Naoya: Anyways, let me explain.

Arisato Minato: Nobody wants you to, tbh.

Kuze Hibiki: If this is about Hidehiko's ass..

Minegishi Kazuya: Guys what the fuck.

Toudou Naoya: Stfu I'm trying to speak.

Arisato Minako: That's very rude, Naoya, Kazuya. No cussing in this pure chat.

Toudou Naoya: Hibiki said ass!

Arisato Minako: Oh? Yeah well, Hibiki is a free man and he gets to do anything he wants.

Kurusu Akira: Fuck.

Arisato Minako: Good boy.

Toudou Naoya: ANYWAYS, I want to speak with you all.

Kuze Hibiki: Is it about Hidehiko's ass?

Amano Maya: You mean his "plush, beautiful, absolutely stunning" ass?

Toudou Naoya: I cant believe my own mom is bullying me.

Suou Tatsuya: She's younger than you.

Toudou Naoya: That's besides the point! Let me speak for once in my god damn life, you sluts.

Kurusu Akira: gasp

Arisato Minako: Naoya, what did I say about corrupting my good boy?

Toudou Naoya: Guys for FUCKS SAKE.

Kurusu Akira: Naoya..

Toudou Naoya: I'll call Mitsuru.

Arisato Minato: You wouldn't dare..

Toudou Naoya: Oh, I would.

Arisato Minato: ..Fine, we'll listen.

Toudou Naoya: Thank you!

Toudou Naoya: We need to talk about.. Whatever it is that happened with Minato and Minako, first of all. Also, letting Akira and his bitchboy gang join the Big Boy Shadow Operatives.

Kuze Hibiki: Oh, so are Kazuya and I not a part of this conversation?

Seta Souji: I don't see why not, Shadows, Personas and Demons aren't all that different.

Minegishi Kazuya: Actually

Seta Souji: Continue.

Minegishi Kazuya: 

Minegishi Kazuya: Fuck off.

Kuze Hibiki: Are we even a part of the SO?

Amano Maya: ..Are you?

Arisato Minato: I should ask Mitsuru.

Kurusu Akira: I've been watching you guys fight shadows since I was a kid and all, but what exactly is the SO?

Toudou Naoya: Big Boy Anti-Shadow.. And I guess demons too.. Gang. Find places where shadows reside, and destroy them.

Kurusu Akira: What do we get out of it?

Arisato Minako: A bitch ton of money. Also justice, and hope, or despair. Whatever it is you kids want.

Kuze Hibiki: We're pretty much the same age, Minako.

Kurusu Akira: It is true that some of my friends would live better lives if they got payed, for once. And their neverending thirst for justice would.. Calm, I guess.

Suou Tatsuya: What do you say, Akira?

Kurusu Akira: ..I'd have to speak to them about it.

Toudou Naoya: Okay! No pressure, you can tell us your answer any time.

Kurusu Akira: Thank you.

Kuze Hibiki: So, what happened between Minato and Minako?

Arisato Minato: Okay so I  _swear_ I've never met "Minako" before. And now everyone is telling me she's my sister?

Arisato Minako: That's because I am your sister!

Arisato Minato: I've never met you before in my life!

Seta Souji: Repressed memories?

Arisato Minato: Why would I repress memories of my sister? You're as much of an idiot as ever, Souji.

Seta Souji: So you acknowledge that she's your sister?

Arisato Minato: That isn't what I meant and you know it.

Kuze Hibiki: What if Minako-chan is some sort of evil spirit who inplanted false memories of her into our heads, but Minato completely blocked them out.

Arisato Minako: Haha

Suou Tatsuya: But why would Minato block them out..?

Amano Maya: This sounds like a conspiracy theory.. Any other ideas?

Seta Souji: Maybe Minato's just dumb.

Arisato Minato: You wanna fight, asshole?

Toudou Naoya: Maybe Minato just loved Ryoji so much he forgot her?

Arisato Minako: Or maybe big bro's just being a stupid hoe and is pretending not to know me.

Arisato Minato: Don't call me a hoe, you hoe.

Seta Souji: Gottem.

Amano Maya: Gottem.

Minegishi Kazuya: Gottem.

Kuze Hibiki: Gottem.

Kurusu Akira: Gottem.

Toudou Naoya: Gottem.

Suou Tatsuya: Gottem.

Arisato Minako: :( Whatever.

Toudou Naoya: Oookay! Lastly!!

Kuze Hibiki: If this is about Hidehiko's ass..

Toudou Naoya: Last order of business, Ue-chan's cute, shapely butt.

_Kuze Hibiki has left_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've only ever played Devil Survivor 2.. Twice, but I still don't really see that much of a difference??
> 
> Shorter chapter, but I had fun writing this. I have a hard time changing my writing style, so I went with a more formal one for this. That probably takes away from the charm haha, but yeah!
> 
> I really like Hibiki, but I probably cant write him into the main chat since he isn't a "Persona" protagonist, per se.


	23. Souji's search history.

Minakowo: Hey who wants to see Souji's search history.

Minty: Me.

Yosucce: :^)

Chad: PLEAS NO HAVE MERCY MINAK

Minakowo: "How to exorcise yourself - 1:26 AM"

Chad: MINAKO

Iwhy: Same.

Tatsuya: I can understand where you're coming from, Souji-san. However, think of your little brothers and sister.

Jun: Me too.

Chad: I only have a sister, what are you talking about?

Tatsuya: I have adopted all of you, I am the mother hen. Even Iwai, Takemi, etc.

Iwhy: Excuse me.

Jun: We only adopted Akira and Ren legally don't worry.

Yusuke: Why is Aki crying?

Yusuke: Oh.

Pleasant Boy: I lvo eyo u all thnak uyo,,

Pleasant Boy: Minako give me more blackmail material on Souji, also.

Minakowo: "wikihow to swallow a whole sword- 1:29 AM"

Yosucce: PARTBER R U OK

Chad: NO I AM NOT

Nanako: i wanna know how too

Minty: NANAKO.

Tatsuya: Nanako.

Nanako: Nanako!

Minakowo: "Is it possible to pay NASA to send Buzz Lightyear into space- 3:57"

Death: IM PISISNG MYSE LF

Minty: WHAT THE FUCK

Nanako: buzz lightyear was the first guy on the moon right????

Naonyoom: No that's Buzz Alrdin.

Tatsuya: He was the second.

Tatsuya:  _He was the second man on the moon._

Death: BUZZ LIGHTYEAR WAS THE FISMRST GUY ON THE MOON

NPC69: It's 5 AM

NPC69: I WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON

Pleasant Boy: Didn't you hear? Buzz Lightyear was the first guy on the moon.

Chad: IM GOING TO SKIN ALL OF YOU ALIVE

Yosucce: HOLY SHIT NANAKO

Nanako: no cussing on my sonic discord server you piss drinker

Tatsuya: PISS DRINKER?

Death: LAKDNROJEKEJRBRJHRJR I CANT BELIEV

Minakowo: YOSUKE I DIDNT KNOW YOU WERE A PISS DRINKER

NPC69: IM INVITING AI OH MY GOOOOOD

_That Bitch has changed Yosucce's name to "Piss Drinker"_

Piss Drinker: YOU GUYS ARE FUCKING MEAN

_NPC69 has added "Fucking Ai from the newspaper club"_

Fucking Ai from the newspaper club: Screenshotted.

Yusuke: ...

Pleasant Boy: I'm so sorry you had to see this, sweetie.

Pleasant Boy: Also, hey Ai.

Yusuke: Hello, Ai.

Tatsuya: Hello Ai, welcome.

Fucking Ai from the newspaper club: SWEETIE?

NPC69: Welcome you fucking furry.

Fucking Ai from the newspaper club: Suck my dick NPC.

Yusuke: It's okay, my love.

Pleasant Boy: The light of my life, my everything.

Ryujee: Ew stop being gross at 2 am

Naonyoom: It's 5 am.

Ryujee: What the eff since when

Fucking Ai from the newspaper club: Sakamoto cant say fuck?

Ryujee: No that's fucking wack.

Naonyoom: OSJDIRJEH RYU

Minty: Minako.. Do you have more?

Minakowo: He was on 4chan yesterday at 10:30

Piss Drinker: NANI

Chad: To be fair, someone offered a folder of just pictures of you.

Tatsuya: Someone.. Has a folder of pictures of Yosuke?

Nanako: i have one too!

Piss Drinker: NANAKO WHY

Nanako: teddie sent it to me!

Piss Drinker: TEDDIE WHAT

Pleasant Boy: Yeah, he's been luring people onto 4chan by offering pics of you.

_Pleasant Boy has sent an image_

Pleasant Boy: They're all blurry pictures of you screaming, good meme material.

Monya: Gross..

Fucking Ai from the newspaper club: Can I stay? You guys are my spirit animals.

Tatsuya: Stay.

Naonyoom: Stay stau tsyatsytaysta stay.

Chad: Of course! You're one of us now.

Minakowo: Ily so much Ai.

NPC69: Ew you furry.

Minakowo: Who wants more?

Chad: STOP.

Minty: I want more.

Iwhy: This is kind of funny, to be honest.

Minakowo: "I just astral projected into a universe where furbies dont exist and that universe already achieved world peace, I want to go back.- 4:20 AM"

Takememe: You can help me with my medicines, it might help.

Pleasant Boy: Am I just something to throw away? Is that it?

Takememe: Not unless you introduce me to your smokin' teacher.

Tatsuya: The egg?

Jun: TATSUYA.

Katsuya: TATSUYA.

Lisa⭐Lisa: CHINYAN WHAY

Fucking Ai from the newspaper club: All of this? Is going into the next school newspaper.

Annihalator: I JUST WOKE UP AND I CANT BELIEVE TATSUYA CALLED PRINCIPAL KOBAYAKAWA AN EGG

Ryujee: Holy effin shit

Iwhy: ??

_Pleasant Boy has sent an image_

Iwhy: An actual, living egg teacher. I'm livid.

Takememe: No, not the Minion.

Takememe: The really pretty maid.

Pleasant Boy: You could have just asked me the last time you saw me.

Minty: A world without furbies..

* * *

 

Takememe: I HAVE HER NUMBER.

Takememe: Her name is Sadayo Kawakami, everything about her is so beautiful I'm,,,,

Pleasant Boy: As soon as Kawakami left Tae started crying.

Naonyoom: The living embodiment of "Have you ever seen a girl so beautiful you started crying".

Ryujee: ???? What do u mean? You kno Kawakami outside of school.

Pleasant Boy: Sometimes she gives me free time to make lockpicks.

Monya: Once he went to sleep and whispered, "I'm going to kill Naoya when I get home". I think you should run.

Naonyoom: Can he even reach me?

Pleasant Boy: Wanna find out?

Annihalator: I stacked things on his head during all of that free time.

NPC69: I just laughed.

NPC69: He woke up at one point and made a "mrrrp" sound, I thought it was Morgana.

Chad: HE STILL DOES THAT?

Pleasant Boy: Okay be quiet. Are you going to ask her out for dinner, Tae?

Takememe: Hahahhsishekjr yeah I've heard him do the mrrrp.

Takememe: Also, YES EYSYEYSYESYES.

Tatsuya: I'm proud of you, Takemi-san.

Takememe: Thanks dad.

Iwhy: Congratulations.

Takememe: HAS IWAI GONE SOFT

Iwhy: You're a CHILD I swear.

Jun: Takemi-san, make sure to do it with moderation.

Ryujee: Woah..

Naonyoom: BABYBABYBABYBABYBABY(YEAAAAH) BABYBABYBABY(jazz music)

Minty: Mood.

That Bitch: Congrats, Takemi-san.

Takememe: Now, where's your lover, Dicktective Prince?

That Bitch: I take back my congrats.

Pleasant Boy: I can introduce you to Mishima, he called you pretty once.

Ryujee: He what

Pleasant Boy: You heard me.

That Bitch: The cute small one?

Naonyoom: Are you talking about Akira, Minato or Mishima?

Minty: Naoya you motherfucker

Pleasant Boy: Go suck Hidehiko's dick Naoya.

That Bitch: ..I think that's Mishima, the one who runs the Phansite?

Pleasant Boy: Yeah, that's Mishima.

Annihalator: He called you a bitch once after you said you wanted the pthieves to die.

That Bitch: Yes, people do call me that.

Takememe: Do you wanna.. Meet Hifumi?

Pleasant Boy: You know Hifumi?

Takememe: Yeah, she visits me sometimes. Said I shouldn't take things people say to heart. An absolute sweetheart.

Katsuya: Iwai should meet the Get Smoked kid.

Naonyoom: THE GET SMOKED KID?

Ryujee: My boy Shinya

Annihalator: My boy now.

Monya: I called dibs first.

Ryujee: :(

Monya: Suck it Ryueggy.

Ryujee: EXCUSE ME

Pleasant Boy: WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL RYUJI?

Fucking Ai from the newspapee club: Sakamoto's name will be published as Ryueggy SuckAMoto.

Quadruple Gay: I'd love to suck a Moto if you know what I mean.

Ryujee: LEJDOHRJRJRJR

Naonyoom: REN CAME FROM THE DEAD TO SAY HE'D LIKE TO SUCK YOUR DICK WHAT.

Pleasant Boy: REN.

Tatsuya: Go gettem son.

That Bitch: Bet he tastes like egg, too.

Chad: AKECHI

NPC69: AKECHI

Fucking Ai from the newspaper club: AKECHI?

Naonyoom: How did you not pick that up??? His name is literally that bitch.

That Bitch: That's rude.

Naonyoom: I'm sorry ily you're doing great.

Pleasant Boy: GORO ARE YOU CRYING

That Bitch: NO WHAT GAVE YOU THAT IDEA

Yusuke: The tears, Goro.

Katsuya: Did Ren die again?

Quadruple Gay: Yes.

Ryujee: liar youre just lurking smh

Quadruple Gay: Please send help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is all over the place but!!! We're back on track.
> 
> Ugh, I want to ship Akechi with someone, my wife said Mishima and so did my heart, but my brain??? Says stop.


	24. I haven't updated in a while but wait I can exbla

Lisa⭐Lisa: ay naoya you cheeky rat

Naonyoom: What did you just call me?

Lisa⭐Lisa: a cheeky rat

Minty: ..It fits you.

Naoynoom: That's Rude.

Tatsuya: You should be sleeping.

Jun: You should be sleeping.

Monya: You should be sleeping.

Monya: You'll wake the real cat.

Lisa⭐Lisa: stfu can you guys maybe not get off topic for once

Minty: No.

Tatsuya: No. Go to sleep.

Naonyoom: Tell them to stop calling me a rat, mom.

Tatsuya: Stop calling Rat Boy a rat.

Naonyoom: Oof.

Lisa⭐Lisa: i was about to give you a video of uesugi singing in the shower

Lisa⭐Lisa: but if youre going to be ungrateful..

Naonyoom: Give it to me.

Naonyoom: GIVE.

Death: Please sleep my eyes are starving.

Shihoe: nghngnngnn watr eye

Lisa⭐Lisa: here u go

_Lisa⭐Lisa has sent a voice file_

Pleasant Boy: ..Dancing Queen?

Monya: GO TO SLEEP.

Ryujee: I heard Dancing Queen.

NPC69: Dancing Queen? I'm horny.

Fucking Ai from the newspaper club: Interesting.. This'll go in the newspaper.

Ryujee: what?

Yusuke: Sent me a copy.

Fucking Ai from the newspaper club: Will do.

Tatsuya: I'll just come and take one.

Quadruple Gay: I will too, I'll fit right in.

Pleasant Boy: I dont read the school newspaper.

Minty: Hey guys guess what.

Naonyoom: What?

Minty: You're all gay. Ecks dee.

Death: a

Death: I didnt see the ecks dee coming.

Minty: I'm

Death: Doing your best? I know. I'm proud of you.

Naonyoom: Minato is the team grandpa.

Minty: Do you want to die?

Naonyoom: Yeah.

Tatsuya: Sort of.

Jun: Yes..

Lisa⭐Lisa: i do

Shihoe: Yeah!

Death: Wow, I have new friends!

Shihoe: We were already your friends!

Death: Oenkrkrkr

Minty: lwnrkrnkr..? Right?

Death: How did you know..?

Minty: Lovers intuition.

Death: <

Minty: 6

Iwhy: 6

Takememe: 6

Quadruple Gay: 9

NPC69: Spot the immature one.

Quadruple Gay: Oh oh oh!

NPC69: Yes, Ren?

Quadruple Gay: Is it me?

NPC69: Yes, Ren.

Quadruple Gay: :^D

Ryujee: EFF

MemeSUCC: "No mom im not jacking off my hand slipped"

Ryujee: stfu cryptid

Monya: Surprised you even know what a cryptid is.

Ryujee: stfu cat

Pleasant Boy: Stop.

Monya: Yes, sir.

Ryujee: Yes sir

Yusuke: Yes, daddy.

MemeSUCC: ew inari

Lisa⭐Lisa: use protection

Yusuke: Pretty bold of you to assume that I'd forget to.

Pleasant Boy: Pwhdkvekeishejis

Tatsuya: Are you joking?

Yusuke: Only about the daddy part.

Pleasant Boy: LEHLRJRNRKJWJEJEBRJJD

Naonyoom: This could be us @UwUSuccy

UwUSuccy: Now?

Naonyoom: Ya.

Monya: ITS

Monya: TWO

Monya: IN THE MORNING

Monya: SLEEEEEEEEP

Naonyoom: Ok rude.

Minakowo: Did you change your name, Sugi?

UwUSuccy: i had an upgrade, yes

Fucking Ai from the newspaper club: Expect the newspaper to be out by tomorrow morning.

NPC69: You were being serious?

Fucking Ai from the newspaper club: I was.

NPC69: I suddenly regret a lot.

__

* * *

 

Pleasant Boy: Three people pet my head today, three.

Pleasant Boy: Delete the newspaper.

Fucking Ai from the newspaper club: That's what you get for being a good boi.

Ryujee: some1 called me goofy today :(

Quadruple Gay: I'll kill them.

Ryujee: Renren no.

Quadruple Gay: Fine..

Jun: "Tatsuya Suou(Deja vu boi), brother of Katsuya Suou, also known as the DILF of Japan."

Tatsuya: Please dont call my brother a dilf.

Nanako: Send me a copy!

Katsuya: Actually, I dont mind being called a dilf.

Tatsuya: I MIND.

Monya: PSJEJJAHAHAHHA

Annihalator: OOOOOOOF

Tatsuya: What happened now?

Monya: SOMEONE CALLED AKIRA KITTY BOY

Annihalator: He made the most pathetic "Nnn!" I dont think anyone will forget that.

Ryujee: im down for messin with aki and all, but if they start trying anything other than lightly making fun of him im calling the police

Quadruple Gay: I'm ready to throw down right now.

Nanako: "Seta Souji, also known as Creamy Dreamy Daddy."

Nanako: I dont think i like this newspaper very much

Yosucce: Creamy Dreamy Daddy isn't too far off.

Jun: "Jun Kurosu, the cutest and nicest boy in the chat." I like this part.

Ryujee: "Ryuji Sakamoto, A Good Boy." STOP

Annihalator: "Shiho Suzui is doing great, and it seems as if she and her girlfriend will continue to thrive. With the help of this group of dickheads." How did you get permission to write this.

Fucking Ai from the school newspaper: Oh, you think the school proof-reads these?

Nanako: "Morgana, an actual cat that can write. And talk, according to everyone else in the chat. Sounds fake but okay."

Monya: I'm not a cat, I am Morgana.

Ryujee: mmmmm Akira said the same thing but he still turned out to be a cat so i dunno

That Bitch: "Goro Akechi is the biggest bitch alive." Thanks.

Iwhy: Why do you kids keep calling me gun daddy?

Yusuke: Would you prefer Gun Father?

Lisa⭐Lisa: Or this DICK

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm just trying to self-heal, but everyone else is making it very hard not to want to rip myself apart on a warm summer friday.  
> Also Akira is very cute thank you for listening to my Ted Talk.


	25. No Demons in this Christian Chat

Nanako: mmmm spaghetti

Ryujee: me too that is Relatable

Chad: Speaking of spaghetti.

_Chad had added Hibiki Kuze_

Hibiki Kuze: Mom's spaghetti.

Nanako: on a scale from one to ten how much do u guys love spaghetti

Hibiki Kuze: Like, eight or eleven maybe.

Naonyoom: Six.

Chad: Nine.

Yosucce: Ten my dude

Tatsuya: Eight.

Annihalator: Who is Hibiki?

Hibiki Kuze: That is a question many have asked, I'm basically the first Akira.

Hibiki Kuze: Wait.

_Hibiki Kuze has changed Pleasant Boy's name to "Bootleg Hibiki"_

Bootleg Hibiki: Be quiet you demon fucker.

Tatsuya: I think it's funny.

Hibiki Kuze: Am I wrong?

Nanako: what about kazuya?

Chad: Who?

Bootleg Hibiki: Who?

Hibiki Kuze: Who?

Tatsuya: Who?

Jun: Who?

Minty: Who?

Nanako: :( you guys are mean

Annihalator: We need to welcome this Hibiki guy firstly!

Shihoe: I'm alive again! I wanna meet Hibiki!

Chad: @Iwai would you do the honours?

Iwhy: Welcome Hibiki Kuze, to the spaghetti eaters chat. You cant leave. You're one of us. Your soul is ours. 

Takememe: ONE OF US ONE OF US

Tatsuya: ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US

Lisa⭐Lisa: ONE OF US ONE OF US

Yusuke: One of us, one of us.

Chad: One of us one of us one of us.

Yosucce: ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US

Shihoe: ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US.

Hibiki Kuze: What a warm welcome. Did I join a cult by any chance?

Bootleg Hibiki: Technically, yes.

Iwhy: I've been trying to leave for a few months now, to no avail.

Shihoe: Because you're one of us! 

Yosucce: We're the scooby gang

Tatsuya: No, we are not.

Shihoe: Scooby gang scooby gang scooby gang!

Yosucce: Scooby gang scooby gang scooby gang scooby gang!!

Shihoe: SCOOBY GANG SCOOBY GANG

Yosucce: Friendship ended with Tatsuya, Shiho is my new best friend.

Annihalator: Hey guys?

Shihoe: What is it, Ann-chan?

Annihalator: LENELEKLEBELSKNDHEBWJABS

Ryujee: whipped lol

Annihalator: Shut up Ryuji

Hibiki Kuze: What were you going to say?

Annihalator: 

Annihalator: I forgot.

Ryujee: PAJEJDIJ WELL DONE

Shihoe: That's okay! You'll remember!!

Hibiki Kuze: MmmmMMmmmmmMMMMM

Nanako: Hahaha

Annihalator: Dont laugh at me Nanako!

Bootleg Hibiki: Wow Ann, you sure are talented.

Annihalator: Shut up Akira

Bootleg Hibiki: Sorry sorry. It happens to the best of us.

Annihalator: >:( __

* * *

Tatsuya: I love Jun, thank you for listening.

Jun: ♥❤♥❤❤♥❤♥❤❤

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Both this story and my English has gone to shit haha, I'm sorry! I cant really keep up with all of the characters so uh  
> These are the ones that are here so far!
> 
> Naoya  
> Tatsuya  
> Jun  
> Shiho(Woke)  
> Akira  
> Ren  
> Ann(Cryptid)  
> Ryuji(Cryptid but WOKE)  
> Nanako  
> Mitsuru(Dead)  
> Eriko(Dead)  
> Takemi(Cryptid)  
> Iwai(Cryptid)  
> NPC  
> NPC from the Newspaper Club(Dead)  
> Hibiki  
> Yusuke(Cryptid)  
> Futaba(Cryptid)  
> Yosuke(Cryptid)  
> Hidehiko(Gonna be woke soon)  
> Morgana(Cryptid)  
> I think that's all?  
> 21 people?  
> This wasn't a good idea.


	26. Quality bonding time between the Persona Protags

_Naoya has added Tatsuya, Minato, Souji, Akira and Ren to "Do Velvet Room Denizens See You When You Jack Off?"_

Tatsuya: Uh

Tatsuya: I'd like to think not? What is this, anyway?

Naoya: A new chat with just us, listen! There were so many people in the other one I almost died.

Souji: So basically, we can actually talk here?

Minato: Ew, dont say it like that.

Souji: I didnt say anything weird.

Minato: "talk"

Naoya: Yeah! 

Akira: Gay.

Ren: Gay.

Naoya: Shut 

Tatsuya: Do we even have a topic?

Naoya: Nn.. No?

Akira: I have one, Ren's boyfriend calls him Renren.

Ren: Suck my dick Aki

Ren: Isn't he your best friend? Why dont you call him Ryuji?

Akira: It's funnier.

Naoya: Hmm.. Minamina, Tatsutatsu, Akiaki.

Tatsuya: Naonao.

Naoya: :D we have nicknames now.

Minato: I dont think I want to be friends with you guys anymore.

Naoya: D:

Akira: All those in favour of kicking Naoya out of this friend group say "I".

Minato: I.

Souji: I.

Tatsuya: I.

Ren: I.

Akira: Eat dick, Naoya.

Naoya: :(

Tatsuya: Naoya who?

Naoya: Guys stop my feelings hurt

Ren: Dont worry Naoya, maybe the nice crows will accept you into their group.

Souji: a

Souji: I dont think I like this joke anymore.

Akira: Weak, but me neither.

Souji: Naoya!

Naoya: Souji! :D

Minato: Does Naoya have a dick piercing?

Naoya: Wanna find out?

Minato: Not anymore.

Naoya: Fair.

* * *

Tatsuya: I love Jun a lot.

Ren: Dont we all?

Minato: Tbh.

Tatsuya: I'd die for him.

Akira: You will.

Tatsuya: a

Tatsuya: What does that mean?

Akira: One day he'll do something so cute you'll die.

Tatsuya: Doesn't seem like a bad way to go, honestly.

Naoya: I'd like to  **This has been censored.**

Ren: Na

Ren: Nao

Ren: Naoya what did you say?

Naoya: Oh, sorry. Let me repeat that.  **This has been censored.**

Souji: ..I'd say that's disgusting but I dont know what he said.

Akira: I have an idea.

Tatsuya: Do we want to know..?

Akira: Probably not.

Naoya:  **This has been censored.**

Naoya:  **This has been censored.**

Naoya:  ** _This has been censored._**

Minato: Tatsuyaa...

Tatsuya: Naoya stop you're scaring the children.

Ren: Actually I'm 11 so I'm technically a teenager in some countries

Souji: Heck you dad Im not a child

Minato: I cant believe Souji god damn swore.. Tatsuyaaa...

Tatsuya: All of you are on thin fucking ice.

Tatsuya: Except for Akira.

Akira: >:)

Tatsuya: An angel, you all should look up to him.

Akira: Yeah, sluts.

Naoya: He called us sluts.

Tatsuya: Is he wrong?

Minato: I guess not about Souji.

Souji: Minato that is Mean.

Minato: It's just banter please dont tell mom.

Tatsuya: I will have to tell mom if you keep this up.

Minato: NO

Souji: TATSUYA PLES

Ren: DADDY NO

_Tatsuya has added Jun_

Jun: All of you are literal children.

Naoya: Its kind of funny tho

Akira: Ren.. Has a daddy kink?

Ren: HEY SHUT

Jun: You're just now noticing?

Akira: I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed

Naoya: She was looking kind o

Naoya:

Souji: ..Naoya?

Naoya: 

Minato: I cant believe he died before he could finish his sentence.

Akira: It was for the good of the people.

Souji: DID YOU KILL HIM

Akira: Hm, I should go to the diner. Get my charm up, maybe.

Souji: AKI

Akira: I'll see all of you later, bye.

Jun: F.

Souji: F.

Minato: F.

Ren: F.

Tatsuya: F.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Update your fucking fanfic, Ko." Whispers my wife, as I weep onto our hard wood floor. 
> 
> I didnt write this out of fear for my life, actually! She just said she likes my jokes, and it'd be nice if I updated. So here it is!
> 
> I keep getting really confused so here's this, just the Persona Protagonists! Uh, Ren and Akira count as the same protagonist, I think?
> 
> Also, who should I add back? The boyfriends, most likely. But yeah.


	27. My non-existent dick wrote this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I uhhh wanted to do something for Yugi's birthday but I never update this anymore, so I tried to write that thing about uhhhh Kyouko and uhhhh Hotaru. I didn't know how to start it or even write it though, so I just went with chatfic again haha.. I hope no one minds.

Fumihiro: Kyouko needs to grow some balls.

Moon Moon: What?

Fear of Firecrackers: Explain.

Kyouko: Dont explain.

Skinny Penis: CRYPTID SPOTTED

TearMeIntoPieces: CRYPTID SPOTTED

Fumihiro: She was gonna confess, but she asked Hotaru out for dinner.

Kyouko: Ughhhhh

Fear of Firecrackers: Technically that's a date.

Moon Moon: 

Moon Moon: Hey Aki wanna go out to dinner

Ren: Do you want to fight?

Moon Moon:

Hottieru: What do you mean confess? Did she do something?

Kyouko: I was the one who ate your chapstick.

Chi*clap*yo: no??? that was me????

Kyouko: Quiet

Hottieru: Oh! That's fine, it wasnt that good anyways.

Fumihiro:

Moon Moon:

Shiba-inu: 

McLady Ann:

McLady Ann: Tell us how your date goes.

Hottieru: I will!

* * *

Hottieru: Kurusu do you seriously work everywhere? I cant even buy flowers without seeing that smug cat-like grin.

Fear of Firecrackers: Weren't you supposed to be heading to your date?

Hottieru: Wait.

* * *

_Hotaru > Akira_

Hotaru: I'll admit they're for Kyou.

Akira: Oh?

Hotaru: Shut up, delinquent.

Hotaru: They're just flowers for a friend.

Akira: Sure.

Hotaru: Shut up.

Akira: Didn't you ask for Gardenias, though?

Hotaru: E.. Eh?

Akira: ??

Hotaru: I didn't mean it like that! Either way, I like boys! 

Hotaru: Kyou is here, dont you dare say anything.

* * *

McLady Ann: And then Ryuji said "I cant believe Akechi is into bondage."

Moon Moon: 

Fear of Firecrackers: Is this the story about the Bondage Angels?

NPC69: The fucking what.

Shiba-inu: Aki did the word bondage summon you?

Fear of Firecrackers: Shiho, please dont.

McLady Ann: Do you still have the bondage angel?

Fear of Firecrackers: Yeah.

TearMeIntoPieces: thats kinky

Moon Moon: I'm sorry but what are you talking about?

Ren: This is how the phantom thieves do things.

Moon Moon: You go up to angels who like bondage and.. Converse with them?

Ren: Actually they're the shadows o

McLady Ann: IF THEY'RE THE TRUE SELF DOES THAT MEAN AKIRA IS INTO BONDAGE.

Fear of Firecrackers: I'm afraid of chains, actually.

Ai from the school newspaper: Is it because you've been in prison so many times that you cant stand to look at them? PROOF THAT KURUSU IS A CRIMINAL.

Fear of Firecrackers: There's this long-nosed man..

Shiba-inu: Who?

Ren: Are you talking about Igor? Sick, who're your velvet room attendees?

Ren: ..Are they wardens?

Fear of Firecrackers:

Ren: OH DAMN

Moon Moon: I'm confused! But uh! Do you guys think Hotaru and Kyouko-san are okay?

* * *

_Akira > Hotaru_

Akira: Mishima wants to know if you two are okay.

Hotaru: Fuck um can I ask you something?

Akira: Yes?

Hotaru: If hypothetically.. I was in love with my best friend...

Akira: Go for it.

Hotaru: Eh? But there's no way she likes me back.

Akira: Do you have any proof?

Hotaru: Damn, well.. No.

Hotaru: Maybe I should go for it anyways! I wont know unless I find out!

Hotaru: Thanks Kurusu, I feel like I can do this.

Akira: Good luck.

* * *

Fear of Firecrackers: Hotaru-san says it's going fine.

McLady Ann: Setting up social links with our class already?

TearMeIntoPieces: https://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DgpqmoBYkQfc&ved=0ahUKEwjpo7jAgLvbAhVGOMAKHXN6CJ4QyCkINTAB&usg=AOvVaw1eY8oM-Lz14OqJrAGl7lUu

Fumihiro: https://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DgpqmoBYkQfc&ved=0ahUKEwjpo7jAgLvbAhVGOMAKHXN6CJ4QyCkINTAB&usg=AOvVaw1eY8oM-Lz14OqJrAGl7lUu

Chi*clap*yo: https://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DgpqmoBYkQfc&ved=0ahUKEwjpo7jAgLvbAhVGOMAKHXN6CJ4QyCkINTAB&usg=AOvVaw1eY8oM-Lz14OqJrAGl7lUu

Yeet: https://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DgpqmoBYkQfc&ved=0ahUKEwjpo7jAgLvbAhVGOMAKHXN6CJ4QyCkINTAB&usg=AOvVaw1eY8oM-Lz14OqJrAGl7lUu

NPC69: https://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DgpqmoBYkQfc&ved=0ahUKEwjpo7jAgLvbAhVGOMAKHXN6CJ4QyCkINTAB&usg=AOvVaw1eY8oM-Lz14OqJrAGl7lUu

Moon Moon: https://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DgpqmoBYkQfc&ved=0ahUKEwjpo7jAgLvbAhVGOMAKHXN6CJ4QyCkINTAB&usg=AOvVaw1eY8oM-Lz14OqJrAGl7lUu

Shiba-inu: https://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DgpqmoBYkQfc&ved=0ahUKEwjpo7jAgLvbAhVGOMAKHXN6CJ4QyCkINTAB&usg=AOvVaw1eY8oM-Lz14OqJrAGl7lUu

Kyouko: Guys holy shit

Kyouko: I have a girlfriebd noq

McLady Ann: Congratulations!

Fumihiro: About time.

NPC69: Just btw Ryuji owes me ¥18,000.

Ren: I'll pay for him.

NPC69: That works..?

Hottieru: /////

Fear of Firecrackers: Well done.

Ai from the school newspaper: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

 

 

 


	28. Did you see that Shinji? (Neon Genesis Evangelion spoilers)

Naoya: Okay so, lets try this again.

Naoya: Add your boyfriends.

_Souji has added Yosuke_

_Naoya has added Uesugi_

_Akira has added Yusuke_

_Ren has added Ryuji_

_Minato has added Ryoji_

_Tatsuya has added Jun_

Ryuji: there already was one of these

Naoya: We're trying to restart.

Uesugi: These nicknames are boring.

_Uesugi has changed the names of 11 people_

_Uesugi has changed his name to "Magical Something"_

Garter Belts: Dont bring Yugioh into this poor chat, :(

The Real Edge of Glory: I dont think I like this name.

Genji: it suits you, akira.

Chad: Oh, come on. Are you serious..?

Garter Belts: Whose Genji? Also, HAH suck it Souji.

Genji: im yosuke.

The Real Edge of Glory: Get fucked, Souji.

Genji: kinky, ill be rite there

Chad: a

Magical Something: ew get a room

Genji: i plan on it js js

Dick Pitt: Why am I named after a Yugioh character, change it back.

Angel: Who is Dick Pitt?

Dick Pitt: ..It's Tatsuya.

Angel: Pfft

Dick Pitt: Hidehiko you have a problem.

Magical Something: I have no idea what youre talking about

Paint Licker: Is this a euthemism?

The Real Edge of Glory:

Paint Licker: I can hear your laughter from over here, Akira. 

Slut: This is MEAN. 

The Real Edge of Glory:

Slut: AKIRA STOP

Garter Belts: At least its better than mine.

Slut: Wanna swap?

Garter Belts: No.

Slut: :(

Tokiya: who the fuck is tokiya

Magical Something: ;)

Slut: Daddy.

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: I dont understand my name..

Tokiya: holy shit i knew you sounded familiar

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: What?

Tokiya: r you that effin angel guy from evangelion?

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: The who from the what?

The Real Edge of Glory: Uncultured swine.

Slut: I cant believe this, we're watching Evangelion right now. Bring snacks and your wallets.

Dick Pitt: I'm not bringing my wallet but I'm coming either way.

Magical Something: i expected better of you nao

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: :( sorry.

Magical Something: its ok u'll understand soon

* * *

Tokiya: WHY WOULD HE DO THAT

Garter Belts: Dont blame Shinji, he was under a lot of stress.

Slut: Technically he still killed Kaworu.

Magical Something: LISTEN GUYS

Magical Something: if Kaworu is an angel, then isnt it good that he died?

Tokiya: IT ISNT GOOD FOR MY HEART

The Real Edge of Glory: :'^(

Dick Pitt: That was unfair. Having Shinji get attached to Kaworu and then killing him off..

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: Ah, so that's where that line comes from.

Magical Something: "I really was born to meet you"?

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: That, and the "dont pilot the eva Shinji" thing.

Angel: Kaworu really was an angel.

Genji: says the angel

Garter Belts: Kaworu reminds me of someone, actually..

Chad: Who could that be?

Garter Belts; Well..

Ryooj: Hm?

Chad: Ah.

The Read Edge of Glory: Ah.

Angel: Ah.

Ryooj: ..Okay? Uh, Naoya, did you enjoy?

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: I did!

Magical Something: GREAT

Magical Something: Now u'll understand my references.

* * *

Genji: souji pls tell chie to stop playing the kazoo outside of my house at 2 am

Chad: Of course.

Genji: SHE JUST STARTED PLAYING IT LOUDER

Chad: She'll get bored eventually.

Tokiya: what song is she playing?

Slut: What song is she playing?

Genji: ugh

Genji: Two Trucks by Lemon Demon

Genji: teddie is gonna cry ples have mercy

The Real Edge of Glory: Give me a minute.

Chad: ??

Genji: WH

Genji: WHAT DID YOU DO ALL THE WAY IN TOKYO

The Real Edge of Glory: Relax I just told her to shut up.

Chad: Why didnt it work when I asked?

Garter Belts: She knows you've been sucking his dick.

Chad: Do you ever have anything nice to say to me?

Garter Belts: No.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Names!
> 
> Magical Something: Uesugi  
> Garter Belts: Minato  
> The Real Edge of Glory: Akira  
> Chad: Souji  
> Genji: Yosuke  
> Dick Pitt: Tatsuya  
> Angel: Jun  
> Slut: Ren  
> Tokiya: Ryuji  
> Paint Licker: Yusuke  
> DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: Naoya  
> Ryooj: Ryoji
> 
> A few of these are references to voice actors other roles. For example Naoya's(I used Akira Ishida(Who also voiced Minato!) since he was the voice actor for the first drama CD) who voiced the big bitch Kaworu.  
> And, Mamoru Miyano who voiced Tokiya Ichinose and Ryuji.


	29. Just for this I'm gonna have to kill you???? Sorry man.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was on a holiday, I didnt have any fun though so it wasnt really worth it?  
> My wife couldnt come so.. I was Sad :(
> 
> We had the Tetsutetsu fight while I was there though! She thinks it's a dumb name, but I really dont?? I mean, who knows when someone is calling him by his first name, but it's a good pun either way.

Tokiya: CAN YOU GUYS

Tokiya: HELP ME WITH SOMETHING

Genji: Sup?

Tokiya: Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu is a DUMBASS name, right?

Magical Something: The fuck kinda name is that?

Slut: LISTEN, the guy can turn his body into IRON and his name is literally IRON.

The Real Edge of Glory: Good morning, what are we talking a

The Real Edge of Glory:

Magical Something: Aki are you ok?

_Sojiro has added himself into the chat_

Sojiro: Why the hell are you laughing?

Genji: HE'S LAUGHING?

Sojiro: It's like a creepy giggling, but either way it's scaring the customers.

The Real Edge of Glory

Tokiya: Gonna be honest here

Tokiya: What customers

Tokiya: ..

Tokiya: Oh fuck I can feel someone staring at me

Slut: THIS IS WHAT YOU GET FOR CALLING TETSUTETSU'S NAME DUMB

Tokiya: :^( 

Slut: Did you just try to type that in caps

Paint Licker: He did.

Sojiro: Ironiron?

The Real Edge of Glory: This one guy who can turn to steel or something.

The Real Edge of Glory: Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu

Sojiro: ..I'm leaving.

Garter Belts: Please dont leave me alone, I'm at my limit.

Genji: Yeah dude, stay, Mina has started enabling us and I Dont Think Thats Safe

Chad: I'm sorry Sakura-san, but how did you add yourself into this chat?

Sojiro: I'm God.

_Sojiro has removed himself from the chat_

Magical Something: What the fucoksljskd oh my goiapsbfpjr

Angel: I dont like that.

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: I'm scared.

Tokiya: What the eff, how long have you two been in here?

Angel: Since the start, by the way I think Tetsutetsu's name is really clever.

Dick Pitt: Me too.

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: Seconded.

The Real Edge of Glory: Thirded.

Paint Licker: Ryuji if you dont eat your ramen I'll do it for you.

Slut: Aw how sweet you took the hungry boy out?

Tokiya: It's because 'Kira has been worried sick about him lately

Tokiya: ALSO YOU CAN EAT IT BUT BE CAREFUL

Paint Licker: Thank you, I'll make sure to repay you.

Tokiya: Aw, dude you really dont have to. It's fine! I'm just glad you finally got to eat something.

_Sojiro has added himself to the chat_

Sojiro: Could just mooch off of the kid.

_Sojiro has removed himself from the chat_

The Real Edge of Glory: He's right but I'm really happy you two are getting along!

Ryooj: I think he's gonna cry

The Real Edge of Glory: These are manly tears be quiet.

Slut: YOU TWO ARE HANGING OUT TOO?

Ryooj: Yeah, I've never seen Aki so happy lmao, gay.

Paint Licker: I appreciate the offer, but I could never "mooch" off of Akira! He works hard enough as it is.

The Real Edge of Glory: I've been AT LEAST trying to feed you thrice a week, please accept our offers to get food for you more.

Garter Belts: If it helps, Me and Mitsuru-san went grocery shopping for him. We'll drop by in a few minutes?

Paint Licker: This is..

Garter Belts: Ryoji told me what you like, so I tried my best.

Paint Licker: Thank you, Arisato-senpai.

Garter Belts: Minato is fine, Yusuke-san.

Paint Licker: Alright then, Minato. Thank you.

Angel: Ah, sorry. But how does Ryoji know what he likes?

Ryooj: I'm a being that is too complex for nya'll to comprehend, I can figure out this much.

The Real Edge of Glory: Yeah, I agree that your stupidity is too difficult to comprehend sometimes.

Ryooj: hEY

Garter Belts: He isnt wrong.

Ryooj: :(

Garter Belts: I still love you though.

Ryooj: :D I love you too

__

* * *

 

Paint Licker: Really, I cannot thank you enough.

Garter Belts: It's fine, Mitsuru bought you some vitamins just incase, too.

Garter Belts: Just so you know, Aki is making food, so I suggest you head on over there. And thank him for this, too.

Slut: Kekekekeke

Paint Licker: Oh?

Garter Belts: He's the one who asked us. Mitsuru refused to let him pay, but either way.. Yeah.

Ryooj: tfw you get too tired to finish your.. Yeah.

Garter Belts: Wanna die?

Ryooj: YOU CANT KILL ME I HAVE THE POWER OF GOD AND ANIME ON  _MY_ SIDE

Paint Licker: So it was Akira all along, huh.. Fascinating, he continues to help me, trying to consider my feelings in the matter..

Paint Licker: Thank you for telling me this. I'll be on my way now.

_Sojiro has added himself into the chat_

Sojiro: Do it in moderation.

_Sojiro has removed himself from the chat_

Slut: DAMN

Slut: GET SOME DICK AKIAKI

The Real Edge of Glory: That's not what this is about!

Chad: Hmm.. Doubt.

Genji: Sounds fake.

Tokiya: Hey 'Kira how willing are you to sacrifice the world and yourself for your boyfriend.

The Real Edge of Glory: HELLA.

Tokiya: WOAH ME TOO WANNA BE BESTIES?

Dick Pitt: Dont break anything.

The Real Edge of Glory: Too late

Ryooj: OOF

Genji: WHAT DID HE BREAK?

Ryooj: a finger, he straight up Dia'd that bitch tho

Paint Licker: Amazing.

Angel: STOP BREAKING BONES

The Real Edge of Glory: You cant tell me what to do, you're not my mom.

Dick Pitt: Legally he is.

The Real Edge of Glory: Damn.

Angel: NO BONE BREAKING

Slut: Can I break my bones mom?

Angel: Absolutely, you rat man.

 


	30. the endo da

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: Hey Tatsuya

Dick Pitt: What?

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: [I found your anime theme song.](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cmYC_LUZux4)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay first of all I'm hella sorry for not updating and then coming back with this.. Thing.
> 
> First my wife said she needed to go back to Italy for family reasons, but my boss wouldnt let me go with her and started breathing down my neck telling me to finish a whole lotta cases :'^   
> He probably doesnt like the fact that I'm married to a girl, this is so sad can we get a uhhhhh kek in the chat?
> 
> I'm so tired, and so so sorry, so I'll try to write something tomorrow since I'm done with everything anyway!


	31. Wow I love not sleeping ever

Genji: Sometimes I feel like my dick is in flames

Garter Belts: Wtf why even

Genji: I heard Souji nya so

Ryooj: Would I get dicked down by Minato if I said nya?

Garter Belts: No I'd kill you.

Ryooj: 

Garter Belts:

Garter Belts: No I'd uh

Slut: You can do it

Garter Belts: Pet you?

Ryooj: Pet me how?

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: What the fuck guys I'm like 7 stop

The Real Edge of Glory: I'm telling dad.

_Yamato Hotsuin added himself_

Yamato Hotsuin: Sex jokes bad.

_Yamato Hotsuin kicked himself_

Chad: Wait, how?

Angel: Souji dont question things, you'll hurt yourself.

Chad: Be quiet I maxed out all of my stats.

Slut: I havent :^(

The Real Edge of Glory: Yeah your intelligence is still at oblivious.

Slut: I will throttle you with my own two hands.

Tokiya: I didnt know you were into chokign, dude..

Slut: PQHAJE HEY

Tokiya: Hewwo

Slut: Dont hewWO ME YOU WANNA FIGHT, LOVE OF MY LIFE?

Tokiya: Can we fight on the grass, I dont wanna hurt you..

Slut: 

Slut: Yeah

Tokiya: Sick

Tokiya: Guys come watch, Shujin yard. 4:20 pm.

The Real Edge of Glory: Who wants to place bets using money that'll go to Yusuke no matter who wins?

Angel: Ohhh! Me!

Dick Pitt: I'll bet on Ren.

Ryooj: I also bet on Ren!

Garter Belts: I guess I'll vote Ryuji, since the money will go to Yusuke anyway.

Paint Licker: Has anyone seen Ren fight?

Chad: Yeah he used to beat me up as a child.

Magical Something: i'm gonna bet on my bro Ryuji because I can

Slut: great les goooo

* * *

 

 

Magical Something: Big oof, Ryuji.

Dick Pitt: I called it.

Garter Belts: I cant believe Ryuji is fucking dead.

_Yamato Hotsuin added himself_

Yamato Hotsuin: Watch your language.

_Yamato Hotsuin kicked himself_

_Sojiro Sakura added himself_

Sojiro Sakura: Watch your language

_Sojiro Sakura kicked himself_

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: Rip Ryuji

The Real Edge of Glory: As much as it hurts watching my brother beat up my best friend, that's just how it is on this bitch of an earth.

Angel: Dont be overdramatic. He just sat on him.

Genji: Looks like Ryujis dick is in flames now.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this with my tit  
> Anways this is a lot less funny because uh, depression hit me like a truck and I just wanted to.. Write a bit.


	32. Mmmm grayons

Tokiya: Mmmm grayons

Genji: Saaaame

Magical Something: Hey guys what the fuck

_Yamato Hotsuccin has added himself_

Yamato Hotsuccin: Language

_Yamato Hotsuccin no longer has admin privileges_

_Yamato Hotsuccin can no longer leave_

FutaBara: No more playing God for you, Hotsuin.

_Yamato Hotsuccin has been promoted to God_

Yamato Hotsuccin: :)

Chad: You cant leave you're one of us now.

Slut: :aye: Yamameme

_The Real Edge of Glory renamed Yamato Hotsuccin to "Nyarit System"_

The Real Edge of Glory: Add your boyfriend now, its tradition.

Garter Belts: he's here now too?

Nyarit System: Which boyfriend? 

Tokiya: Two boyfriends?? Who this fuckboy?

Nyarit System: Dicky and Hibecky

Paint Licker: BECKY

The Real Edge of Glory: Yu-chan chill. You got with Daichi, too?

Nyarit System: You underestimated me.

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: DUDE I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT.

Garter Belts: Too much caps ow

Ryooj: Get sooome

_FutaBara has added Bootleg Akira and Fresh Car Smell_

Bootleg Akira: Hawaii desu

Fresh Car Smell: hi!

Bootleg Akira: I trusted you to hawaii desu with me, I want a divorce

Fresh Car Smell: wait ily no Hibiki bleas

Nyarit System: :)

Bootleg Akira: I feel threatened, hello sweaty

Chad: We should welcome you three!

Nyarit System: I want to leave but it wont let me.

Chad: I said,  _we should welcome you three!_

FutaBara: Yeah Hotsuin I did that :) 

Nyarit System: :) Haha :) I will :) squish you :) like a :) bug :)

FutaBara: :) Try it :) Bottom :)

The Real Edge of Glory: Hello, Yamato. 

Nyarit System: Hello, Akira. 

Chad:  _Everything about this family is a nightmare_

Genji: OH F DID SHE CALL THE DUDE A BOTTOM

Fresh Car Smell: did you ever doubt me when i told you

Genji: I mean, sort of??

Slut: Did you seriously not notice the huge bottom vibes Yammy gives off or

Genji: No he's scary wth

FutaBara: Doubt

Genji:  _What do you mean "doubt"? Have you met him?_

FutaBara: No but I've seen him and he looks like a twink. 

Bootleg Akira: Doubt. His muscles nut worthy

Nyarit System: You better think twice before saying anything else about me. 

Dick Pitt: Welcome, you three.

Nyarit System: Ban me. 

Angel: One of us

Paint Licker: One of us one of us

Slut: ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US.

The Real Edge of Glory: One of us! One of us! 

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: One of us one of us!  

Magical Something: ONDOFUS ONEOF US ONE OF US

Genji: ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OFUSONEOFUSONEOFUS

Nyarit System: Regret. Regret is all I feel right now.

FutaBara: Send nudes

Nyarit System: Only if Hibiki or Daichi send theirs to me. 

New Car Smell: ;) 

Nyarit: I was kidding. 

Bootleg Akira: Haha thanks but please change my name.

FutaBara: Nyo

The Real Edge of Glory: How does that feel?

Bootleg Akira: Hi I'm Akira I suck ding dong

The Real Edge of Glory: :0

Pain Licker: Kek

Angel: Ah, sweetie who taught you that?

Paint Licker: Akineru's friend Mishima.

Angel: Well, give me a minute. I'll be right back, dont worry!

* * *

* * *

 

Jun - > Yuuki

Jun: Hey Mishima-kun?

Yuuki: Oh, Kurosu-san! What is it?

Jun: Turn on your location, I just want to talk.

Yuuki: Wh

* * *

* * *

 

Chad: Did you just call him.. Akineru?

Paint Licker: Oh, yes. I thought it fit him.

Chad: That.. It does. How sweet. 

Ryooj: Hail Sleepy Protagonist gang!

Dick Pitt: Where's Jun?

The Real Edge of Glory: Akineru.. Ah..

Genji: Ohhh who is in the sleep p gang?

_Bootleg Akira has set his name to "Byakkoromaru"_

Ryooj: Minamina, Aki, Nao.

Ryooj: Tatty is the True Neutral, and Souchin is..

Chad: Scoobert doobert

Garter Belts: Furry

Chad: Suck me.

New Car Smell: So guys, we did i

Byakkoromaru: Continue that and get a spanking.

New Car Smell: *sticks ass in air* so guys, we did it, we reached a quarter of a million subscribers

Byakkoromaru: ;^) ohhhh 

Nyarit System: I want a divorce. 

New Car Smell: wait Yammy no ily

Magical Something: It didnt have to be this way, this could have been something good.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dick Pitt:  _Where's Jun_

Angel: I took the Moon kid out for ice cream after I scolded him, no worries.

Dick Pitt: Ah, I'm glad. 

New Car Smell: Hey guys guess what

Nyarit System: Hibiki pretty

New Car Smell: Exactly

New Car Smell: Also Hibiki guess w

Byakkoromaru: Yammy pretty

New Car Smell: Absolutely

Byakkoromaru: Hey Yammy guess what

Nyarit System: Daichi pretty

New Car Smell: a snjbshaosndndjjsndjjdd fuc k?????

Byakkoromaru: :aye:

Ryooj: I'm writing this with my dick

Garter Belts: You're using your face.

Ryooj: :) 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Small brain: Hibiki x Io (I'm so sorry Io ily)   
> Regular brain: Hibiki x Daichi, Yamato x Hibiki  
> Big brain: Yamato x Daichi  
> Godlike Brain: Daichi x Yamato x Hibiki
> 
> I had fun hn, I was in the hospital for a while, but it's ok!


	33. Being with you, I'm reminded of it every day.

"As a child, before my parents.. Before all that.. I asked them how I'd know if I loved someone. "

Yusuke hummed, "What did they say?"

The voice on the other line paused, before recalling a sleepy, "They told me I'd figure it out when I'm older."

"And did you?"

The artist knew how hard it was for Akira to talk about his feelings, he wouldn't pressure him. Not ever.

And so he sat on his bed tapping his pencil against his cheek, hoping that the other teen didn't fall asleep-  _it wouldn't be the first time,_ Yusuke thought- before responding.

Akira's soft voice was all he heard, everything else seemed insignificant, even if for just a moment. 

"Yeah.. I feel as though being with you, I'm reminded of it every day.. Something like that, maybe."

A faint 'ah' was heard from the other end, "Yu-chan.. I'm sorry if I woke you."

 _I couldn't stop thinking about you,_ was left unsaid. He knew. 

"That's alright, I was thinking about painting anyway. Besides, if it's you, I wouldn't mind no matter what."

"..I'm glad... I'll take you to dinner as an apology. Don't fight me on it."

Yusuke chuckled, "Okay," it was just an excuse to feed him, of course. Akira really loved looking for those. The shorter boy often expressed his concerns about his diet, and even offered to take him out or make him dinner whenever he could. 

He was.. Glad, that someone was so willing to give him every ounce of support and kindness they had.

"You should sleep, Aki," he said. "I know you dont handle being up for so long well."

"Oh.. Yeah, thank you.. I love you, Yu-chan."

"And I you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was meant to be a aquarium date but I dunno how to write sodbksbsisvdjdhaosbd  
> Calls are somehow more difficult to write than I thought akshjsbsjs time to die
> 
> Its so different from what I usually write and??? Writers my dudes how do you do it???? Ilysm??? My respect increased by uhhhhh 100%  
> I really liked writing it. It's definitely a little eh though.


	34. fuck

Genji: mm sphaggethti

Chad: You know Yosuke, this is why I never make spaghetti.

Genji: its bcuz youre a party pooper

Nyarit System: it is 3 am i will fucking destroy you go the fuck to sleep or so help me

New Car Smell: im horny

Nyarit System: the audacity of this bitch

Genji: ;-; ok dad ill sleep

Chad: I cant believe you're cheating on me with the takoyaki man.

Genji: rebecca its not what it looks like

Chad: I wont hesitate bitch.

The Real Edge of Glory: :( you woke me up

Nyarit System: Execution Time

Genji: wait n

Chad: I cant believe Yosuke is deaDAHSJABDKFBKEBjsbajHahabKabaj

* * *

 

Byakkoromaru: Do we press f or do those two not deserve it

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: It would be the polite thing to do if we pressed f so

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: F

Byakkoromaru: f

The Real Edge of Glory: f

Paint Licker: F

Angel: F

Tokiya: fuck

The Real Edge of Glory: the one time we tell you to say f

Tokiya: eat ass skate fast

Magical Something: ok but can i ask smth

Genji: ye watchu want

Magical Something: does anyone here put meat on their mac n cheese or is everyone just a loser

Genji: im lactose intolerant

The Real Edge of Glory: meat has milk in it??

The Real Edge of Glory: wait no

Dick Pitt: meat has milk in it??

Ryooj: meat has milk in it??

The Real Edge of Glory: stop bullying me

Tokiya: meat has milk in it?? 

Genji: SKSKSKSKSKSK

Chad: sksksksksksksksk

Nyarit System: skskskskskkskskskksksksk

Paint Licker: Akira..

_The Real Edge of Glory has changed his name to Akira_

Akira: its too long for the writer to write 

Akira: dont do it yuchan

Paint Licker: meat has milk in it?? 

Akira: i trusted you

Tokiya: OH

Tokiya: takoyaki man can u sing

Nyarit System: No. 

Tokiya: great. sing take on me 

Nyarit System: No. 

Byakkoromaru: ill admit that ako is the best bandori girl

New Car Smell: fuck off its minato

Byakkoromaru: work with me we're trying to get yammy to sing

Nyarit System: taaaaake oooon meee

Dick Pitt: That doesnt count, you just wrote it. 

Akira: amazing do the minecraft version next

Nyarit System: miiiiiine diiiiiamoooonds 

Ryooj: wow this is some real stripper action do minecraft despacito next

Nyarit System: miiiinecraaaaftcito when you need to survive all day and all night craft a diamonds sword so you can fiiiiight

Chad: I hate this.

Nyarit System: I dont know about you guys but I'm receiving head pats for this. See you later virgins.

Byakkoromaru: who introduced memes to Yammy

New Car Smell: me

Byakkoromaru: saaame

Paint Licker: If I sang minecraft songs would I receive money.

Dick Pitt: Ask literally anyone here and we'll buy you a mansion.

Angel: Thats implying I didnt already.

Ryooj: Blessed

Dick Pitt: Blessed

Paint Licker: Blessed

Akira: Blessed

Garter Belts: hey guys I'm

Ryooj: inviting Junpei?

Garter Belts: y

Ryooj: es?

Garter Belts: you always know what to say..

Magical Something: what r you inviting Junpei for

Garter Belts: I

Rooj: Have

Garter Belts: No

Ryooj: Choice

Garter Belts: Also he asked and Mitsuru thinks it'll be funny.

Genji: do et

Genji: do et do et

Tokiya: one of us one of us

Nyarit System: Who? 

DONT PILOT THE EVA SHINJI: one of us one of us

_Garter Belts has invited Stupei_

Stupei: hit or miss i guess they never miss huh

Garter Belts: I'll ban you 

Genji: disgusting

Byakkoromaru: god are all hets like this

Dick Pitt: I have grown another leg because of the absolute disgust I was forced to go through. How dare you.

Stupei: i am are have weed

Akira: what language are you speaking

Stupei: wiener

_Stupei was banned_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my battery percentage is at 57% and i want to end myself hi welcome to uhhhhhh mcdondald


	35. help

Garter Belts: Souji is a lvl 1 crook

Chad: What

Angel: Ah yes.. I see.

Genji: im already lvl 1 crook

Chad: What?

Garter Belts: maybe he'll be boss then

Tokiya: im already boss

Akira: haha get it because the meme

_Paint Licker has sent an image_

Paint Licker: Instead of laughing at your phone, make an effort to get down from the tree you're in.

Tokiya:

Tokiya: 'kira are you cryin

Akira: no

Nyarit System: You truly are what they call.. a dumbass.

Ryooj: I can help!

Akira: please

Paint Licker: You know, sleeping there wasn't your best idea.

Akira: I Can Tell

Tokiya: sleeping in

Tokiya: a tree

Magical Something: wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Akira: :(

Garter Belts: just jump down

Ryooj: Ah.. Minato, he'll break something.

Garter Belts: serves him right

Akira: :(((((

_Magical Something has changed the chats name to "Lemon Lime Time"_

Garter Belts: im going to beat y

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im gonna write more i swear if not you can bully me @ twt @yuu_k_ey
> 
> i wrote this right after getting stuck in a tree because inspiration hits and akira is a cat

**Author's Note:**

> :/ :^/ :^)


End file.
